


This Isn't Everything You Are

by snarfette



Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Mentions of Prostitution, Mentions of Violence, Past Character Death, mentions of past abusive relationship
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-03-05
Updated: 2015-03-05
Packaged: 2018-03-16 11:25:39
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 27,938
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3486464
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/snarfette/pseuds/snarfette
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Louis is used to dealing with the harsh reality of his life. He doesn’t need help from anyone else because the thought of letting anyone get close is pretty scary. But Harry seems determined to be part of Louis’ life and that terrifies him more than anything.</p>
            </blockquote>





	This Isn't Everything You Are

**Author's Note:**

> Disclaimer: I do not know or own any person mentioned in this story. I’m not making money from writing this. This is a work of fiction; it obviously hasn’t happened and obviously never will. 
> 
> Title comes from the song of the same name by Snow Patrol.
> 
> Feedback is lovely, please and thank you!
> 
> Now with a translation into Spanish here:  
> https://www.wattpad.com/story/79305214-this-isnt-everything-you-are-espaol-ls   
> Thank you to Paulylyh for translating.

It was bloody freezing: the kind of night where Harry couldn’t wait to get home. It wasn’t like he had any reason to hang around anyway.

He’d been on the closing up shift at the bar and, once he’d said his ‘goodbyes’ to his workmates, he was keen to get back to his flat as quickly as possible to get wrapped up in his duvet and fall asleep.

Walking swiftly along the street, he shoved his hands further into the pockets of his coat, making a mental note to remember his gloves tomorrow night. A thick frost had already covered the parked cars and pavement and he wondered if there was snow forecast for the near future.

The bitterly cold weather wasn’t the only reason that Harry had for moving quickly. Unfortunately for him, in order to get home from the bar that he worked at, he had to pass through a rather ‘dodgy’ part of town. He could have avoided it if he’d wanted to walk a few miles out of his way, or if he’d been willing to pay for a taxi (and wait for an hour for one at this time on a Friday night), or if he’d driven his car to work and parked it in the ridiculously over-priced public car-park round the corner from the bar. None of those things were an option and Harry had walked the same route several times in the last year without problems so he just kept walking swiftly, staying alert to anything that seemed amiss. He had often wished for someone to make the journey with but none of his co-workers lived in the same area as him so each night he drew himself up to his full height, fixed his eyes straight ahead and strode along purposefully.

The people hanging around on the street in the middle of the night and early morning were not exactly reassuring. Every so often, Harry walked past a woman in a tiny mini-skirt or a skin-tight top who grinned at him in what he assumed was meant to be an alluring manner but really just made him feel uncomfortable.

There were men hanging around too, although most of them looked more like boys. Sometimes they tried to attract Harry’s attention, excited that he was a customer. Occasionally, some of them hurled abuse at him as he walked by, threatening him not to even _think_ about trying to steal their business. That was a truly disturbing thought.

He recognised a lot of their faces now. He knew the same faces from night after night of the same routine. Sometimes he wondered how they’d got into such a situation; he wondered how desperate someone would have to be to sell their body night after night. But still he just kept on walking.

It seemed that his rush to get home that night meant he didn’t notice when a tall, skinny figure stepped out in front of him. Harry almost collided with the young man blocking his path but stumbled to a halt just in time.

“Hello handsome,” the man drawled as he fluttered his eyelashes.

Harry wondered for a moment if that was a cheesy opening line that all rent-boys and prostitutes used, before he attempted to side-step the man.

“Where you going sweetie? Are you lookin’ for something special tonight?” The prostitute moved in front of Harry again and smirked at him.

“No, I’m just going home,” Harry mumbled. He looked at the scrawny figure before him: the clothes that hung loosely off the boy’s skinny frame, the sallow complexion and sunken eyes that were desperately hoping Harry would be his next pay-packet.

“I bet you’d like some company on a cold night,” the prostitute continued trying to persuade him.

“I’m sorry…” Harry said and he really did feel awful. Not that he wasn’t going to be a paying customer but that there were people living like this.

The smile faltered a little before brightening falsely again. “Come on,” he was practically begging now, “I’ll do you a deal.”

Another voice interrupted before Harry could reply again. “Fucking hell Sam, how desperate are you? The bloke’s not interested.”

Harry turned around and saw another man leaning against the wall, cigarette in one hand, the other tucked inside his jacket pocket, looking completely casual. He recognised the new speaker; he’d seen him working on this street before. Maybe he was so recognisable because he didn’t seem like the other prostitutes somehow. He stood out because he _wasn’t_ forcing himself forwards like the others. And maybe, just maybe, Harry remembered him because he had the most startlingly blue eyes he’d ever seen, but he wouldn’t admit that to himself because that was not something he should be thinking about prostitutes. 

“Piss off Louis,” the other man, ‘Sam’, retorted as he scowled at him.

“Charming,” the blue-eyed man replied easily. “That’s not very friendly, is it? And here’s me thinking you were trying to make a good impression.” He waved his hand in Harry’s direction as he spoke.

Sam seemed confused and he looked between Harry and Louis quickly as he visibly tried to process what was going on. Harry realised that his eyes were slightly glassy, his pupils were blown wide, and he probably had no idea what was going on at that moment.

“Look,” the other man spoke again as he steered Sam away from Harry, “Isn’t that one of your tricks?” He pointed to a car that had just pulled up in the shadows of one of the buildings and Sam stared for a long time before he nodded enthusiastically. Then, without another word or even a glance at Harry, he trotted across the road towards the waiting vehicle.

Harry’s rescuer, Louis, turned back around and looked a little surprised to find him still standing there.

“I’d keep walking if I were you, Curly,” he said, before he took a long drag on his cigarette.

“Um…well...” Harry coughed to clear his throat, “Thanks…for that.” He waved his hand around rather pointlessly before shoving it back into his coat pocket.

“Don’t mention it,” Louis replied bluntly. “And seriously, keep walking.”

He didn’t allow Harry a chance to speak again as he turned around and headed back down the street.

A woman yelling in the distance snapped Harry out of his momentary daze and he quickly turned around and followed Louis’ advice.

***

It had been several weeks since Harry had been stopped on the street on his way home from the bar. For the first few nights, he had been sure that he would run into Sam again and possibly find himself in another awkward situation, but he had managed to make his walk home without being propositioned and without running into any trouble. He had seen Sam hanging about but the young prostitute had never shown any recognition of Harry, which led him to believe that he was so strung out on whatever drugs he was using that he simply didn’t remember their encounter.

A few times, he had also seen Louis and he _had_ received a few knowing looks from him. But whenever Harry had smiled at him tentatively, Louis had always looked away immediately or turned to wander off.

***

The bitterly cold weather seemed to be giving way to slightly higher temperatures as Harry made his way home. It had been a fairly quiet night at the bar so he had managed to get away a little earlier.

He was just about to cross the road to head towards the park, which was another shortcut to his building, when he heard a low groan from somewhere behind him. He paused on the kerb for a moment. He had a choice now: either ignore it and just keep walking, or turn around and deal with whatever it was. A shuffling sound, followed by another pained moan helped make his decision and he turned around quickly.

Narrowing his eyes to try to see in the dim light cast by the yellowy street lamps, he could make out a figure slumped against the wall in the gap between two buildings.

Taking a step closer, he called out, “Hello? Are you alright?”

There was no answer except for a sharp inhalation.

Harry moved closer again, pulling his phone from his pocket and turning the flash-light on. He lifted it towards the person on the floor and watched as a man he recognised squeezed his eyes closed at the bright light and raised his hand to try to block it.

“Louis?” Harry asked as he drew closer, lowering his phone so that it wasn’t so blinding.

Louis forced his eyes open and stared back at Harry in obvious shock.

There was a graze across his left cheek and his t-shirt was ripped at the collar. When he tried to look at Harry, his eyes looked unfocused and his eyelids seemed to be drooping heavily.

“What happened?” Harry asked as he squatted in front of him.

“Nothing,” Louis answered immediately.

Harry raised his eyebrows. “Hmm, looks like ‘nothing’. I suppose that’s why you’re on the floor looking like someone hit you.”

Louis scowled at him, or at least tried to. It looked like more of a wince. “I’m fine,” he said. “Nothing for _you_ to worry about.” He started trying to push himself up but there was obviously more to his condition than what Harry could see because he groaned in pain again as he moved.

“Let me help,” Harry offered, but as he reached out to take Louis’ arm, Louis flinched away from him.

Louis stared at him suspiciously. “I thought I told you to keep walking,” he said eventually.

Harry nodded slowly. “Yes, you did. But that’s easier said than done, especially when you need help.”

“I _don’t_ need help,” Louis protested, but it hardly sounded convincing.

“Well, I’m not leaving you here like this,” Harry said with a shrug. “You can’t even get up on your own. Where else are you hurt?”

Even though his eyelids still looked heavy, Louis managed to look at him defiantly.

“Well, if you won’t let me help you, I’m going to call an ambulance,” Harry told him as he looked at his phone.

That seemed to startle Louis into speaking. “No!” he practically shouted. “No, please don’t…I can’t…”

“Then let me help you,” Harry said simply. “Think of it as I’m repaying a favour. You helped me out a while ago so I owe you one.”

Louis blinked at Harry slowly a few times. “Alright,” he agreed quietly, after a long silence.

Harry smiled and nodded. “So, where else are you hurt?”

There was still plenty of hesitance from Louis before he eventually replied. “I hit my head, think I maybe got knocked out for a minute. And my side hurts a bit.”

“Okay,” Harry said slowly. “Well, we should probably get some ice on your head and your side. Let’s get you on your feet.”

He held out his hand and for a long moment Louis just stared at it.

After a while, Louis lifted his own hand and allowed Harry to pull him up carefully. He wobbled slightly once he was upright and Harry immediately wrapped an arm around his waist to support him. Louis tensed a little at the contact but didn’t pull away.

“Do you want me to help you get back to your place?” Harry asked.

If Louis had seemed tense before, it was nothing compared to how his whole body went rigid at Harry’s question.

“Um…no…not there…I…um…I don’t know…” he trailed off.

Sensing that there was no way that Louis was going to change his mind, Harry offered the only thing he could think of.

“Alright, well my flat’s not far. Do you think you can walk?”

“Your flat?” Louis asked as he looked at him in shock.

Harry shrugged slightly. “Yeah, I’ve got ice…I think. I’ve definitely got some frozen peas though.” He smiled what he hoped was a reassuring smile as Louis still looked like he might protest.

Neither of them moved for a while as Louis seemed to be assessing Harry and making a decision about what he was going to do. It was obvious that he didn’t have too many choices but he still looked doubtful about going with Harry.

“I’m Harry, by the way,” he introduced himself, “I just realised that you don’t even know my name.”

“Okay, Harry,” Louis eventually said. “Let’s go.”

Harry smiled in relief, pleased that Louis had finally decided to accept his help.

They set off across the road, moving slowly as Harry supported Louis who seemed to be a little unsteady on his feet.

When they reached Harry’s flat, he pushed the door open and guided Louis inside. He immediately deposited him on the sofa and disappeared to fetch some ice for Louis’ head.

When Harry walked back into the living room, with a tea towel full of ice cubes, Louis was sitting rigidly on the sofa staring around the space nervously. He looked ready to make a run for it at any moment despite the fact that he was obviously still struggling with the blow to the head he’d received.

“Here,” Harry said quietly as he handed him the towel.

“Thank you,” Louis murmured. He winced as he pressed the ice against the back of his head and wrapped his other arm around his middle.

“Do you want a drink?” Harry asked him as he stood watching, not really knowing how else he was supposed to help. He wasn’t sure why he’d thought it would be a good idea to bring Louis here; all he’d known was that he couldn’t leave him on the street like that.

“Um…a cup of tea would be nice please,” Louis replied quietly.

“Sure,” Harry said, before he went back to the kitchen.

A few minutes later, he returned with two steaming mugs of tea and placed them on the coffee table. Then he produced a packet of painkillers from his back pocket and put them on the table too.

“Thought you might want to take a couple of those,” he said, and then he sat down in the armchair.

Louis grabbed his mug with his free hand and leant back against the sofa. Despite his eyelids drooping, he was still watching Harry carefully.

“How are you feeling?” Harry asked after a few minutes of strange silence.

“The ice was a good idea,” Louis replied. “And tea always helps.”

“Yes, tea is the solver of all problems,” Harry nodded.

As if showing his agreement with that sentiment, Louis took a sip from his mug.

“So, why are you walking through the red-light district, all alone, in the middle of the night, several times a week?” Louis asked when he lowered his mug. “You’re not a hooker, you’re not a dealer.”

“I work at a bar, ‘The Pear Tree’ in town, I’m often on the closing up shift so that’s probably why you see me on my way home,” Harry explained.

“Are you at uni?” Louis asked.

Harry nodded. “Yeah, I’m doing my degree in physiotherapy – I’m in my third year.”

Louis gave a tiny nod and focused on his mug for a while. He looked deep in thought.

When he had drained the last of his tea, he placed the mug back on the table and looked at Harry steadily. He looked exhausted; not just the kind of tiredness that came over you at the end of a long day, but the kind of bone-weary fatigue that built up over a long period of forcing yourself to keep moving, never allowing yourself to stop and take a break, never having chance to recharge your batteries fully before the next onslaught. If Louis allowed his eyes to close and stay that way, Harry had no doubt that he would fall asleep in seconds.

Harry leant forward from his seat and picked up the two now-empty mugs. “I’ll get you some water so you can take some painkillers,” he said as he pushed out of the armchair.

It didn’t take Harry long to pour a glass of water and refill the kettle, but by the time he wandered back into the living room Louis’ eyes were closed and he was breathing deeply. He was still sitting upright on the sofa but Harry didn’t have the heart to disturb him to try to make him move into a more comfortable position and he certainly didn’t think that Louis would take too kindly to being disturbed from his sleep by Harry looming over him. Instead, he fetched a blanket from his room and gently laid it over Louis before sitting back in the armchair. He flicked the television on and watched it with the sound so low he could hardly hear it.

More than once he found himself staring at Louis’ sleeping face. There was a bruise forming beneath the graze on his cheek and he looked so incredibly vulnerable that Harry felt an almost unnerving desire to look after him. He didn’t even know why he felt that way. He didn’t _know_ Louis; he had no reason to want to help him. But there was something drawing Harry towards him, something that Harry knew he wouldn’t be able to fight.

***

‘Fuck that hurts,’ and ‘Not my ceiling’ were the first two things that Louis thought when he opened his eyes. The pain in his side, across his cheek and at the back of his head was the first thing he registered, then as he forced his bleary eyes open he had noticed the large crack in the plaster above him and known that he wasn’t in his own bed. Then he’d realised he wasn’t in a bed at all but lying down, half-covered by a blanket, on a sofa.

Without making any sudden movements, he turned his head to the side and saw Harry fast asleep in the armchair, head leaning against the back of the chair, mouth hanging open, his arms crossed over his abdomen like he was hugging himself. Louis might have smiled at the image if he wasn’t feeling quite so confused.

He cast his mind back to the events of the previous evening: he’d got on the wrong side of the john that had picked him up (or rather the bloke had just decided that Louis needed roughing up), he’d been in an alley when Harry had found him, and Harry had helped him for some unknown reason. Louis had been suspicious last night, sure that Harry would be expecting something in return for his help, but so far he’d seemed like a decent enough guy – although why he’d go out of his way to help a prostitute was a mystery to Louis. It seemed pretty good of him though to bring Louis back to his flat and let him stay…

“Oh shit!” Louis burst out as he sat up immediately, pushing the blanket from his legs.

Harry startled awake at the sound. Blinking in confusion, he looked around before his eyes landed on Louis and he seemed to remember the events of the previous evening.

“What time is it?” Louis asked him immediately.

“Um…” Harry looked at the watch on his wrist, still trying to focus after being so rudely awoken, “Twenty past six.”

“I have to go,” Louis announced as he stood up quickly. He wobbled a little on his feet and Harry was immediately standing beside him looking concerned.

Louis looked up at him with wide eyes. “I have to go,” he repeated. “I’ve got to get back…I shouldn’t have fallen asleep, I shouldn’t have stayed here.” He sounded panicked.

“It’s okay,” Harry said gently. “I can drive you if you want.”

Again Louis wondered what was going through Harry’s mind. Why on earth did he feel the need to offer him any further assistance?

“You’ve already done enough,” Louis replied quietly. He really didn’t know how to deal with this.

“Really,” Harry persisted, “It’s nothing. You’ll get home quicker if I drive you and, to be honest, you don’t look like you’re up to walking too far.”

Louis wanted to argue that point, he was perfectly capable of getting home on his own, but he knew that Harry was speaking sense and he really would get there quicker by car. He was also silently debating whether or not it was a good idea to let Harry see where he lived. Louis was very strict about keeping his work away from his home, but he reasoned that Harry wasn’t actually a customer, and from his actions so far he didn’t seem like someone to worry about.

“I…I don’t want to put you out,” he said eventually.

“You’re not,” Harry replied easily. “Come on.”

He turned around and led Louis out of his flat and down to the car park.

Harry’s car was an old Fiesta and Louis couldn’t help but think it was a typical student car as he slid into the passenger seat. Harry started up the car and, with directions from Louis, they started making their way through the reasonably quiet streets.

“Are you going to get into trouble for staying out?” Harry asked after a while.

“Trouble?” Louis asked in confusion.

Harry glanced at him quickly. “Yeah, you know, like, from your pimp or something?”

Louis’ eyebrows rose and he bit down on the scathing reply he might have made, knowing that Harry hadn’t meant any offence.

“I don’t work for anyone else, I don’t have a pimp.” he said slowly. “Why would you even ask that?” he added.

There was definitely a tinge of pink on Harry’s cheeks as his eyes flicked between Louis and the road. “Sorry…I just…um…you were so worried about getting back, and you said you shouldn’t have stayed out so I thought maybe you weren’t…allowed, or something.”

Louis supposed that that kind of made sense. For a fleeting moment, he also thought that Harry looked adorable when he got all flustered and didn’t know what to say, but he pushed the idea away as quickly as it came to him.

“I’m not going to get into trouble, but…” he trailed off, he wasn’t planning on sharing anything about himself with Harry (at least nothing more than what was necessary). “I just need to get home, that’s all.”

Harry nodded once in understanding as they continued their journey.

Louis was wondering whether he should tell Harry to drop him off somewhere close to his house so he could walk the rest of the way, which would mean that Harry didn’t actually find out where he lived. But he got the distinct impression that Harry was the chivalrous type who would wait and see him in through the door before he drove away, so that plan wasn’t going to work.  

Eventually, Louis instructed Harry that he should slow down and they crawled along the road until he told him to stop.

The surprise was obvious on Harry’s face as he peered out of his window at the house before looking back at Louis with a raised eyebrow.

Louis could understand his confusion; it wasn’t exactly the sort of house that a person might expect a hooker to live in. But it _was_ where he lived and despite everything that Harry had done for him, Louis didn’t exactly feel like sharing his life story with him and explaining the situation.

He cleared his throat. “Um, thanks for dropping me off…and um, for your help…last night,” he said, his hand already reaching for the door handle.

“That’s alright,” Harry replied easily, “It was no trouble.”

“Right, um, thanks,” Louis repeated before he pushed the door open and quickly climbed out of the car.

“See you around,” Harry called.

Louis hesitated for a moment at the words, glancing back at Harry who was smiling at him, before he shut the door and began a slow walk up the driveway to the front door. His side was aching and his head was pounding but he didn’t want to let it show because he had no doubt that Harry would come bounding out of the car like a knight in shining armour to assist him with the walk and then would probably insist on getting him settled inside and he really didn’t need that. The complications involved with allowing Harry inside didn’t bear thinking about.

Once he had made it to the door, he turned briefly and, as expected, Harry was still there in his car. Louis lifted his hand slightly and gave a half-wave before pulling his keys from the pocket of his jeans and quickly letting himself into the house. He shut the door behind himself and leant back against it heavily, letting out a long breath. Outside, he heard the engine of Harry’s car rattle to life and then the clunk of gears as it moved away.

In a perfect world, Louis would have dragged himself off to bed to catch up on some much needed sleep. In a perfect world, he might have met Harry in a bar somewhere (rather than on the street) and got talking to him, he might have flirted and got his number and eventually asked him out on a date because Harry seemed like just the sort of man that Louis would like to spend time with. But unfortunately life wasn’t perfect: Louis couldn’t go and crawl into bed and he couldn’t date Harry. He frowned at his own thought process: his current life goals were to fall asleep, and go on a proper date with a man he actually liked.

He sighed deeply and then pushed himself away from the door. He had time to make himself a cup of tea and take a couple of painkillers before he had to face the next part of the day. Sleep would come after that. Dating someone like Harry would be a fantasy that would never come true. Achieving at least one of his goals would have to do.  

***

The day after Harry had dropped Louis off at home, he had done something rather strange.

At about 4 o’clock that afternoon, he had decided to go and check on Louis. He spent the entire drive over to the house telling himself that it was a good idea.

When he pulled up outside the house, he turned off the engine and stared out of his window. The house was in a nice residential area. There was a row of similar looking homes lining the road on both sides. Parents were arriving home from the school-run and unloading their children, there were new cars parked in some of the driveways, the majority of the front gardens were tidy and well-kept.

Louis’ home didn’t particularly stand out amongst the others. The lawn in the front garden could do with mowing and there were a few weeds poking out from between the block-paving on the driveway but it looked pretty much like every other family home in the street. That was what seemed so strange. Why on earth was Louis living in a house that probably had four bedrooms and was in the middle of a quiet suburban street? It wasn’t that Harry was judgemental, it was just that he found it hard to imagine a prostitute living in such a place.  

Eventually, he climbed out of his car and walked up to the front door. For a moment he considered that maybe this wasn’t such a good idea. Maybe Louis wouldn’t react too kindly to him arriving unannounced on his doorstep but what was the worst that could happen? And it wasn’t like he could have checked on Louis in any other way seeing as he didn’t have his number. Deciding that it would be alright, he lifted his hand and knocked.

He could make out a blurry shape through the frosted glass window pane and then the door was partially opened. The chain was obviously across as the face of a pretty teenage girl, dressed in a school uniform, peered out through the gap that was only a few inches wide.

The girl looked out at Harry with wide blue eyes that seemed so familiar. ‘She _has_ to be Louis’ sister’, he thought to himself as he tried to get over his surprise.

“Hello,” he said brightly, “I was just wondering if Louis was around.”

The girl looked at him slightly suspiciously, another look that Harry recognised immediately. “He’s asleep,” she replied. “Who are you?”

“I’m Harry,” he said with a smile that he hoped looked reassuring rather than like a creepy stranger. “I just wanted to make sure he was okay.”

The girl’s eyes widened and she smiled slightly. “Oh, do you work at the nightclub with Lou?”

Harry was caught completely off guard. _Nightclub_? What the hell? But he decided to play along. Louis had obviously created a story about where he went every night and who was he to walk up to his front door and ruin it? And it wasn’t a total lie to say that he worked in a club. “Um…yeah, yeah I work in the club.”

“Were you there when that bloke hit him?” the girl asked.

“I…helped look after him afterwards,” Harry half-lied.

The girl smiled again. “Well, he’s asleep now and I don’t want to wake him up because he’s got a shift tonight and he was pretty tired after sorting us out this morning.”

_Us_? How many of them were there? And why was Louis responsible for looking after them?

“Sorry I can’t let you in,” the girl continued. “Lou’s dead weird about stuff like that. Doesn’t like us opening the door to strangers and would go _mental_ if I let you in without him being down here. He’s a bit overprotective I think. Sorry, but I’ll tell him you called round.”

“Yeah…thanks,” Harry said. He smiled again and turned away from the door. He heard it close behind him and wondered what the hell was going on. He also wondered if he’d ever get to find out.

***

“Why did you come to my house?”

Harry almost slammed straight into Louis as the shorter man stepped out from the shadows of one of the buildings and stood right in Harry’s way as he headed home the following night.

Louis’ eyes were narrowed as he stared at Harry suspiciously and his words were sharp and to the point. The mistrust he felt was blindingly obvious.

Harry blinked at him slowly a few times as he tried to get over the shock of being stopped in his tracks so abruptly.

“Why did you come to my house?” Louis repeated tensely. “What do you want?”

Shaking his head slightly and frowning, Harry replied, “I don’t _want_ anything. I just came to see if you were alright.” 

Louis looked doubtful and still rather angry. “Well you shouldn’t have. I don’t need you sticking your nose in.”

“I wasn’t trying to cause trouble,” Harry said slowly. “I really just wanted to make sure you were okay. I thought you were on your own and you’d had a bump on the head so…you know.”

“Well I’m fine, as you can see,” Louis snapped.

The bruise and graze on his cheek and the way he was holding his side didn’t exactly reinforce his point.

“I’m surprised you’re here…I thought you’d maybe take a few days off to recover,” Harry said.

Louis huffed out a bitter laugh. “No rest for the wicked,” he sneered. “Besides, some of the customers like bruises so it’s my unique selling point for a while.”

Harry felt, and looked, horrified by the words.

“So now that you’ve seen that I’m alive, I assume you’re going to leave me alone,” Louis said. His voice had lost its sharpness and he was watching Harry closely.

It was more than a little crazy that Harry didn’t instantly answer with a ‘yes’. He didn’t _want_ to leave Louis alone. Even though he hardly knew him, had only shared a few brief conversations with him, he felt like he wanted to get to know him better. He wanted to know who he was and why he was living this life.

“I…I could help you,” Harry offered quietly.

Louis’ eyes widened and then narrowed as he looked angry all over again.

“I don’t need your help,” he spat. “I’m not some fucking charity case that you can adopt to make yourself feel better.”

“That’s not what I want,” Harry protested. “I want to help.”

“Why do you even _care_?” Louis asked exasperatedly. “You don’t even _know_ me. You don’t know anything about me.”

“I’d like to,” Harry replied and then he actually blushed as Louis’ eyes widened at his words. “And anyway, I do know some things about you: I know you’re called Louis, and I know where you live, and I know that you have a sister.”

Louis flinched slightly at those words.

“And I know that you look like you’re having a tough time,” Harry continued. He knew that he was pushing his luck. Louis didn’t seem like he took too kindly to people interfering in his business. He seemed very protective of his life and his secrets and Harry was sure that at any moment he would turn and walk away from him.

Louis released a long breath. He looked very weary again all of a sudden. It was like the defensiveness had drained from him. 

“You can’t help me,” he said quietly as he looked away from Harry. “I don’t rely on anyone else these days.”

That seemed like a terribly sad sentiment to Harry. He chewed on his lower lip thoughtfully for a moment “Maybe it’s time you did. I know you don’t know me very well, and you don’t really have any reason to trust me, but if you ever change your mind and think you’d like to give someone a chance, I’d like to show you that you _can_ rely on other people.”

Louis didn’t comment so Harry rooted around in his coat pockets before he pulled out an old receipt and a pen. He scrawled his number on the back of the receipt and held it out to Louis.

“Just in case you ever need anything or even if, I don’t know, you just want to talk,” he said with a hopeful smile.

Louis was looking back at him with barely concealed amazement. He reached out slowly and took the paper from Harry’s fingers. “Thanks,” he muttered as he pushed it into his pocket.

“I’ll see you around Louis,” Harry said with another smile before he set off along the street again.

As Harry walked, he wondered if Louis would ever contact him; he really hoped that he would.

***

Louis had a few theories about Harry.

At first, he had thought that Harry was after something. Maybe he’d seen Louis and thought if he helped him out he could get a freebie or something. But there was something about that idea that just didn’t seem right. If Harry wanted to take advantage of Louis he could have already done it – he’d had the opportunity after all. And besides that, Louis just didn’t think that Harry was that sort of person.

Louis had once believed that he was a good judge of character, but certain experiences in his life had left him doubting that. However, despite his defensiveness (self-preservation was how he viewed it) he thought that Harry seemed like a genuine person. Even though Louis didn’t know him very well, and he was always cautious around new people these days, he had no reason to think that Harry was a bad person. Harry’s actions so far were not the actions of a horrible person.

So, if Harry wasn’t trying to screw Louis over in some way that meant he had to rethink his judgements.

Maybe Harry was lonely and wanted a friend. He seemed like the sort of person who would be universally popular though and Louis couldn’t imagine him not having anyone to talk to.

It might have been that he was just some nosey do-gooder that liked interfering in people’s business. In the past maybe he’d ‘saved’ hundreds of waifs and strays from a life on the street or prostitution. Or maybe he was recruiting them for a cult. That didn’t seem all that plausible really.

Maybe Harry was crazy. _That_ seemed reasonable. Why else would he approach random people on the street in the middle of the night and offer to help them out?

Or maybe, just maybe, Harry was a good person. And maybe he really did want to get to know Louis.

Each and every time that Louis thought about his theories, he came back to that conclusion. It was the only thing that seemed to fit but it was also the idea that scared Louis the most. If Harry really was a good person and he really did want to get to know Louis, how was Louis supposed to deal with _that_? He’d been muddling through and coping with life on his own for quite a while now; he wasn’t sure how to let anyone else in.

There was just something about Harry that made Louis think that he should try though, regardless of how scary that prospect seemed.  

***

The phone number flashing up on Harry’s mobile wasn’t one that he recognised and for a moment he considered ignoring it. But something told him that he should answer, so he did.

There was quiet, except for a shuffling sound, when he first held the phone to his ear, and he almost hung up, thinking that someone had dialled his number by accident, but then a cautious voice spoke.

“Hi…um…is this Harry?”

“Yeah, yeah it is,” he replied.

“It’s…it’s Louis…from…well, from the other night.”

Harry didn’t need to be told who it was, he had recognised the voice instantly but he didn’t want to say anything that might scare Louis away now that he’d finally contacted him. It had been a few weeks since Harry had handed over his number and hoped that Louis would call him.

“Hey Louis, is everything okay?” he asked.

“Yeah, it’s fine,” Louis replied immediately and then he went quiet. “I, um, well I probably shouldn’t have called; you’re probably busy.”

“Not at all,” Harry told him. “I’m just sitting with the TV. My flatmate’s out tonight and I haven’t got a shift so I thought I’d have a quiet night in.”

“Oh,” was all Louis said in response.

There was a long silence at both ends of the line. Harry wasn’t going to pressurise Louis; he was happy to wait for him to speak.

“Have you been at uni today?” Louis asked eventually.

Harry was surprised by the question but he answered anyway. “Yeah, I had a lecture this morning and then spent the afternoon working in the library. I’m not so good at concentrating at home – too many distractions.”

Louis hummed softly. “Do you think…” he trailed off.

“Go on,” Harry encouraged.

“You’ll probably think I’m stupid,” Louis said quietly.

“I wouldn’t,” Harry told him earnestly.

Louis cleared his throat. “Could you just, like, talk to me about what you do? Tell me what it’s like and stuff. I never went and…well I wish I had…but I just wondered, you know. You probably think that’s pathetic.”

“Of course I don’t,” Harry said. “I’ll tell you all about it but you have to promise me two things.”

Louis made a low sound at that. Harry noticed that he didn’t actually agree to anything.

“Firstly, you have to tell me if I’m boring you,” he said. “And secondly, if my stories get too long-winded just tell me to get to the point.” He was smiling at the phone like a fool and he had no idea why.

Louis laughed quietly and it made Harry smile even more dopily.

“Okay,” Louis told him, “I can do that.”

With that, Harry launched into telling Louis all about his day. He covered everything from what his lecture had been on that morning to his fellow students to what he’d bought for lunch from the canteen.

Louis seemed totally engrossed in his retelling. He asked questions and laughed at some of Harry’s descriptions. And before either of them knew it, forty-five minutes had passed.

“Oh, I didn’t realise the time,” Louis said at some point. “I’m sorry…I’ve got to go.”

Harry looked at his watch seeing that it was nearly 10 o’clock. There was only one place that Louis would have to be at this time. He felt a wave of disappointment wash over him at the thought.

“Thank you,” Louis added quietly.

“No, thank you for listening to me ramble on,” Harry said brightly. “Will you…well, will you call me again?”

“Um, yeah, I think I will,” Louis answered.

Harry tried not to make it too obvious that he was delighted by the prospect. “Great, because I’ve got loads more to tell you. Or we can talk about something else, anything you like.”

Louis laughed again, “Okay, sounds good to me. Bye Harry.”

“Bye Louis,” Harry replied and Louis hung up.

***

Calling Harry and speaking to him over the phone was safe.

Louis was still struggling with the idea of letting someone get too close to his life but communicating by phone calls, and occasional text messages now too, was a way of getting to know Harry in a more controlled manner.

And Louis was really beginning to like Harry. He enjoyed their conversations, even though it was usually Harry that was doing the majority of the talking.

Louis hadn’t revealed much about himself, he honestly didn’t know where to start with explaining the last few years of his life, so he was quite content to listen to Harry’s slow, deep voice as he talked about all sorts of different topics. He never felt pressured to tell Harry anything but he knew that when he did give him little details, Harry always reacted like it was fascinating, and not in a way that seemed false or patronising.

Speaking to Harry on the phone allowed Louis to forget about the reality of his own life and just imagine that he was listening to a friend tell him about his day. He could almost imagine that he was attending university alongside Harry and they were sharing stories and gossip about their courses and friends. Even if it was only for a short while, he could forget about why he was so tired all the time and how he’d ended up with the life he had.

***

Louis usually called later on in the evenings, so when his name began flashing on Harry’s mobile at half past six Harry immediately thought it seemed strange.

“Hey Lou,” he said brightly, “What’s up?”

“Harry, I…I need your help,” Louis replied quickly. The tension in his voice was immediately apparent.

“What’s wrong?” Harry asked in concern. He had leant forward in his seat, resting his elbow on his knees, as soon as he had heard Louis’ words.

“Can you drive me to the hospital?” Louis said.

“Shit...what’s happened? Are you hurt?” Harry was pushing himself out of his chair as he spoke, rushing to the kitchen to find his keys.

“No, not me,” Louis paused for a moment before continuing, “It’s my sister.”

Harry paused in pulling on his jacket at those words. Louis had always been extremely guarded when it came to family. Harry knew that he had a sister but only because he had accidently been introduced to her when he had turned up unannounced at Louis’ house, but Louis had never mentioned her, had never even told Harry what her name was, but now he was definitely going to find out more information whether Louis really wanted him to or not.

“Okay, I’m walking out of the door now. I’ll be with you as quickly as I can,” Harry told him.

“Okay, thank you Harry,” Louis said before he hung up.

When Harry pulled up outside Louis’ house there was no scene of mass hysteria like he had allowed his mind to create. In reality, he knew that whatever the issue was couldn’t have been life-threatening or Louis would have called an ambulance but he had realised halfway there that he didn’t even know what was wrong with Louis’ sister so his brain had conjured up all sorts of scenarios.

He bounded up the driveway and knocked on the door loudly before shifting his weight from one foot to the other in agitation. There was a blur of movement behind the frosted glass panel in the door before it was pulled open quickly – by Louis’ sister.

Harry just looked at her for a long moment wondering what was wrong with her that required medical attention seeing as she seemed perfectly alright standing in the doorway.

“Hi Harry,” the girl said, “Come on in.”

Harry stepped over the threshold and gazed around the entranceway. The hallway led through to the kitchen at the back of the house with the stairs to the right. There was a mountain of shoes of various styles and sizes piled up in one corner near the front door and a coat rack fixed to the wall that was covered in a range of different coats and jackets. As he glanced down the hallway towards the kitchen, he could see a pile of pots on the counter top near the sink and the sounds of quiet voices drifted towards him. There were photographs framed and hung on the walls on both sides of the hallway but before Harry could look at them, Louis appeared in a doorway leading into the hallway.

“Harry,” Louis breathed out. He looked anxious and agitated as he tried to force a smile. “I’m so glad you’re here.”

Harry might have enjoyed the comment more if it wasn’t for the concerned look on Louis’ face.

“Lottie, we’ll be going soon…can you make sure you tidy up in the kitchen and don’t let them stay up too late if I’m not back, you’ve all got school tomorrow,” Louis said as he looked around Harry at his sister who was still standing in the hallway.

“Will do,” Lottie replied easily. She walked around Harry and pulled Louis into a quick hug as she said, “Call us if you get any news.” Then she turned back to Harry and smiled briefly, “It was nice to see you again Harry.”

Harry nodded and smiled slightly, feeling quite bewildered about the whole situation, before he looked back at Louis.

“She’s in here,” Louis said as he nodded his head in the direction of the room he’d just emerged from.

Harry took that as his signal to move, so he made his way down the hallway and followed Louis into what he realised was the living room.

Lying on the sofa was a young girl, who could have only been ten or eleven years old, with a miserable look of pain on her face. She pouted up at Louis as he sat on the edge of the sofa and ran his hands through her hair gently.

“Phoebs,” he said softly, “This is Harry. He’s going to take us to the hospital so we can get you sorted.”

The little girl moaned quietly and nodded as best as she could with her head against a sofa cushion.

“You’re being really brave, love,” Louis continued, “And I know it hurts, but you need to sit up so we can get your coat on.”

The girl pushed herself into a sitting position with Louis’ help and he held out her coat for her to slip her arms into. She winced and wrapped her arms around her stomach as soon as they were inside the sleeves.

“That’s it, good girl,” Louis encouraged, “Come on then, up we get.”

Louis wrapped his arm around his sister and helped guide her up from the sofa. He nodded his head at Harry and they slowly made their way out of the living room and into the hallway. They paused briefly to pull on a pair of shoes each and then followed Harry out to his car.

Louis strapped his sister into the backseat and then joined Harry in the front of the car.

“Do you have any idea what’s wrong with her?” Harry asked quietly, once they were on the move.

Louis was twisted in his seat so he could keep checking on his younger sister as they travelled. “I don’t know really. I kept her off school today because she said she’d got really bad tummy ache and she had a fever but as the day’s gone on she’s got worse.” He lowered his voice as he turned away to face the front more. “I rang the doctor and he said it might be appendicitis and to go to the hospital to get her checked over because that can be serious if it’s not treated. I don’t have a car and I couldn’t call an ambulance because it’s not an emergency as such and I didn’t know what to do,” he was rambling nervously and it was obvious that he was worried about his little sister. “I’m sorry I had to bother you, I just didn’t know how else to get there, and I suppose I could have called a taxi but I didn’t think of that and…”

Harry reached out and gently placed his hand on Louis’ knee. Louis’ words came to an abrupt halt as he looked at Harry in shock. “It’s okay Lou, honestly. I’m glad I could help you out.” He glanced at Louis for long enough to send him a reassuring smile before turning his eyes back to the road. If his hand stayed on Louis’ knee until he needed to change gears again, it was just because he was trying to keep him calm.

The journey didn’t take too long but by the time they arrived at the hospital, Phoebe looked to be in more pain and Louis was getting more and more concerned. She hardly even wanted to move out of the car so Harry (after asking Louis if it was alright) leant into the backseat and scooped her out. Then, instead of putting her down so that she could walk herself, he set off across the car park carrying her with Louis walking quickly alongside.

When they entered the Children’s Accident and Emergency department, Louis had a conversation with the receptionist while Harry sat down and got Phoebe comfortable (or as comfortable as she could be) on a row of chairs.

Louis approached them and squatted down so he could talk to his sister.

“They’re going to see you as quickly as they can, alright?” he said as he stroked her hair again. “How are you feeling?”

“It hurts,” she replied, her voice sounding so sad and small that both Louis and Harry frowned at the same time.

“I know sweetie, I wish I could make it go away. The doctors will help you though and they won’t be long now. You’re doing so well, keep being brave,” Louis told her.

When he looked up, Harry was watching him with an undeniably fond expression on his face. He looked worried about Phoebe but also like he was witnessing something that was making his heart melt into a puddle of goo.

Louis cleared his throat before he stood up straight. He encouraged Phoebe to lift her head enough that he could sit down and then she laid her head on his thighs. He immediately began gently running his fingers through her hair again.

They sat in silence for several minutes, observing the comings and goings of the department, wondering each time a member of staff appeared if it was going to be their turn to be seen.

“You don’t have to stay you know,” Louis said eventually.

Harry looked at him in surprise but didn’t reply.

“Just…I really appreciate you bringing us here…but I’m sure that this isn’t what you had planned for the evening…so don’t feel like you have to hang around…you’ve done more than enough.”

“I don’t feel like I _have_ to stay,” Harry said with a shake of his head. “I want to. I’m not going to just leave you here.”

Louis was looking at Harry in wonder. How was Harry even real? And how had Louis been lucky enough to stumble upon him? As if Harry hadn’t been kind enough already by bringing them to the hospital, now he was insisting that he wanted to stay.

“Thank you Harry,” Louis said quietly. “I…it means a lot.”

“No need to thank me. Friends support one another, don’t they?” Harry said with a shrug and a small smile.

‘Friends’. Is that what they were now? Louis supposed that they had been getting to know each other and did get on well. Actually, Louis had been finding out all about Harry and not really giving much about himself away at all. But he trusted Harry. The thought caught him by surprise a little but it was obviously true. He must have trusted him or he wouldn’t have called him when he needed help, he wouldn’t have invited him into his home and he certainly wouldn’t have let him meet his sisters. Maybe it was time to give Harry more credit, maybe it was time to let him know that he trusted him.  

“I know you’ve already met…but this is Phoebe, she’s ten and the youngest,” he started slowly.

Harry was watching him closely. He looked like he was hanging on every word, keen to hear any piece of closely guarded information that Louis was willing to share.

“You met Charlotte – Lottie - at the house. She’s sixteen so the eldest after me. Then there’s Felicite, who’s fourteen, and then Daisy who is Phoebe’s twin.”

“Four sisters?” Harry asked.

At Louis’ nod, he widened his eyes dramatically. “A house full of hormones then. And I thought it was crazy living with Gemma as a teenager.” He grinned at Louis and Louis chuckled slightly.

“They’re not so bad,” he replied fondly and his eyes drifted back down to Phoebe who had her eyes closed.

Before Louis could reveal anything else or Harry could ask any questions, a nurse approached them and asked them to follow her through to an examination room.

For a moment Harry hesitated. He didn’t know if he should stay put or follow them.

“Are you coming Harry?” Louis asked when he realised that he wasn’t a step behind them.

“You sure?” he asked as he still hung back.

Louis nodded quickly. “I’ll be holding Phoebe’s hand but I might need someone to hold mine,” he joked. Then he suddenly looked surprised at his own words and blushed a little, immediately looking down at his feet.

When he looked back up, Harry was standing right in front of him. Harry reached out and squeezed his hand tightly before letting his fingers drop. He smiled gently at Louis before they all continued after the nurse who was tapping her foot impatiently as she waited for them.

***

After a few hours, and several tests, Phoebe was admitted onto the children’s ward. The original suspicion that she was suffering from appendicitis had been confirmed and she was scheduled to have an operation as soon as there was an available slot in theatre.

Louis had reluctantly left the hospital with Harry once Phoebe was settled in and sleeping. There was nothing else he could do, it was late and he had promised to come back in the morning as soon as visiting times allowed. Phoebe had been so tired that she hadn’t protested at all, merely nodding as Louis kissed her forehead gently.

The drive back to the house was quiet. Louis looked exhausted but also deeply worried.

When they pulled up outside the house, Harry turned off the engine and twisted to face Louis.

“Are you alright?” he asked quietly.

Louis shrugged slightly. “I’m just worried about her. I wish I could have stayed,” he looked past Harry at the house and sighed deeply. He looked as though he had the weight of the world on his shoulders. “I’d better get in and make sure they’re all in bed and not running riot.”

“Is there anything I can do to help?” Harry asked.

Louis looked at him and smiled slightly. “You’ve already helped so much Harry. Thank you for taking us and staying with me. I really appreciate it.”

“I keep telling you that you don’t need to thank me, I was happy to help,” Harry replied.

Louis smiled softly again. He looked like he was about to say something else but then stopped himself. Instead, he closed his eyes briefly. When he looked back at Harry it seemed like he’d pulled a mask on. He seemed to be psyching himself up to face the next part of his day and Harry realised that he was probably preparing himself to reassure his sisters and make sure they were all consoled even though he himself was incredibly concerned.

‘Putting a brave face on for the children, just like a parent,’ Harry thought to himself. He wondered when Louis ever got to just have a moment to break down or freak out – maybe that was why he always seemed so weary. He was holding everything together all the time.

Louis opened the car door slowly. “Thank you, for everything,” he said, before he swung his legs out and climbed out.

“Call me if you need anything,” Harry called just before Louis shut the door.

Louis smiled at him once more before making his way up the drive and letting himself through the front door.

Harry lingered for a moment at the kerbside. Half of him wanted to walk up the driveway, knock on the door and demand that Louis let him help in some way. But he doubted that that would be very well received.

He wanted to help, for no reason other than he liked Louis. When he had first encountered Louis, he had been curious about him. He had wanted to get to know him. And now, Louis was gradually revealing snippets of information about himself and his life, Harry just wanted to get to know him even more. Harry knew that he didn’t actually _know_ Louis all that well but what he had found out just made him all the more sure that Louis was a good person, a person who deserved love and a person who deserved help, even if he didn’t agree.  
***

The following day, Harry and Louis had exchanged several text messages about how Phoebe was doing and when her operation was due to take place.

Harry had rolled his eyes when he read Louis’ text that morning telling him that he was at the hospital. He text back that he could have taken him to save Louis getting a taxi but Louis had replied (again) that Harry had done enough.

The operation was scheduled for about three in the afternoon so Louis was planning to stay at the hospital until Phoebe came out of surgery and was awake. It was Louis’ text containing that information that gave Harry a wonderful idea about how he could help Louis (and his family) out while things were so stressful.

Louis had been texting Lottie from the hospital with updates about Phoebe’s condition and had been checking what the rest of the girls were doing. Had they all done their homework? Had they put on a load of washing like he’d asked? What were they going to do about tea? Lottie had replied that everything was under control and the ‘food situation’ was ‘awesome’. Louis had thought that seemed a little strange. He hadn’t had time to prepare anything for them to reheat so he’d assumed that they’d have to stick a couple of frozen pizzas in the oven and make do. He really hoped that they hadn’t raided his cash and splurged on a takeaway, especially as he hadn’t been to work for the last few nights.

When he walked into the house, he immediately inhaled something that smelt far too good to be frozen pizza. There was definitely an aroma of a home-cooked meal wafting down the hallway, something garlicky and warming. He could hear excited chatter and the sound of cutlery against plates coming from the kitchen, where the dining table was. He kicked off his shoes and made his way to the kitchen only to stop in his tracks at the sight of his three sisters sitting around the table tucking into a homemade lasagne, complete with garlic bread and salad.

“What…” he started and then trailed off as they turned to look at him. “Where did this come from?” he stepped towards the table, eying the meal curiously. He looked around at the smiling faces that greeted him, knowing that none of them had quite mastered the art of lasagne yet and if they _had_ somehow managed to make it, the kitchen would have been a hell of a lot messier.

“Harry dropped it round,” Lottie told him with a grin. “He said that he knew you were busy at the hospital so he thought he’d make us some tea. There’s plenty left for you, we’ve set you a place.”

“Harry?” Louis practically whispered.

“He’s so lovely, Lou,” Felicite piped up. “We asked him to stay but he said he didn’t want to intrude.”

Louis took a step closer and scanned the spread laid out on the table. A large lasagne, with three missing portions, was still steaming in the middle of the table. He had to admit that the sight and smell made his mouth water and his stomach growl lowly.

He hadn’t spoken for a long moment as he stared at the food but was startled from his thoughts by Lottie.

“Here you go,” she said as she plonked a plate full of lasagne down in front of one of the empty chairs around the table. “So, how’s Phoebe doing?”

Louis shook himself from his daze and took his seat. He cleared his throat and began filling them in on their sister’s condition.

***

Much later, once the clearing up had been done and the girls were all off in their bedrooms, Louis sank down onto the sofa. Leaning his head back, he closed his eyes and took a few deep breaths. He could have fallen asleep quite easily but he forced his eyes open once more.

Unlocking his phone, he pulled up his contacts and dialled Harry’s number.

When Harry answered, he almost sounded like he was nervous.

After the initial greetings, Louis said, “I wanted to say thank you for bringing the food over.”

“Was that alright?” Harry asked cautiously. “I didn’t want you to think that I was sticking my nose in.”

Louis smiled slightly at that: he was pretty sure that at some point he had probably thrown those exact words at Harry so he couldn’t blame him for being nervous about Louis’ reaction. “Of course it was alright. It was really kind of you. You didn’t have to.”

Harry sighed and Louis could almost picture him rolling his eyes and dragging his hand through his hair. “I know I didn’t – I wanted to.” At some point Louis was going to start accepting that – maybe.

“Why didn’t you stay?” Louis asked. “Felicite said they’d asked you to.”

“I didn’t want to impose,” Harry replied. “I thought it would probably be enough of a shock for you to find the food without finding me there as well.”

Louis laughed softly. “You should have stayed. You made the food, you should get to enjoy it. And besides, I’m sure it would have made the girls happy; they seem quite taken with you.”

Harry chuckled, “And what about you?”

There was silence on both ends of the line as Harry suddenly became aware of what he’d asked and Louis found himself fighting a grin and actually blushing.

Louis cleared his throat after a few seconds. “Hmm, I’m warming to you,” he said, hoping the teasing tone carried down the phone line. “The lasagne helped.”

Harry laughed brightly at that, obviously relieved that he hadn’t made Louis uncomfortable. “How do you feel about fajitas?” he asked.

“Should a person have strong feelings about fajitas?” Louis replied.

“I mean for tomorrow night,” Harry told him. “Do the girls eat them?”

That shocked Louis again. “What…um…what are you talking about?” he asked.

“Well, you said you’d be picking Phoebe up tomorrow evening as long as she’s doing alright, so I thought I’d bring tea round again to save you the hassle when you get back. If you let me know a rough time you think you’ll get back, I can get them ready. Or would you rather I came to pick you both up? I suppose that would be better and then I can cook after that if you like.”

Louis had let Harry ramble on, listening to him thinking out loud, but eventually he had to stop him. “Harry, you don’t have to do any of that. I wasn’t expecting you to cook for us once, let alone two nights in a row. We can manage, you don’t have to…”

It was Harry’s turn to cut Louis off. “You keep saying I don’t have to do anything for you, and I keep telling you that I _want_ to. Let me help out Lou. I only have one lecture in the morning tomorrow, I don’t have a shift at the bar, so it’ll give me something to do. Plus, it’ll keep the girls occupied until you get back from the hospital.”

Louis was quiet for a while. He chewed on his lower lip as he considered Harry’s offer. “Alright,” he said eventually, “But only if you stay and eat with us this time and _I’m_ paying for the food.”

“Deal,” Harry said easily.

Their conversation moved on to other things but eventually they had to say their goodbyes.

Louis was still smiling at his phone when he glanced at the clock on the wall. If he wanted to get to work he’d have to get ready and get going soon. The smile fell from his lips at the thought. The problem was that he didn’t _want_ to get to work.

He hated doing what he did. He hated lying to his sisters about where he was going. He hated knowing that in order for them to survive he had to sell himself like he did. He hated how it made him feel about himself.

But as he trudged out into the hallway to begin making his way upstairs, he caught sight of a family photograph from several years ago. He was probably only seventeen or eighteen in the picture. It was taken on some family holiday, maybe in Spain, and they all looked so happy. Even though his sisters had all grown up so much since that picture, he still thought of them in the same way. He still wanted to protect them, still wanted to make sure that they were happy. He tore his eyes away before he allowed himself to linger on his parents’ smiling faces. Despite his exhaustion, despite his self-loathing about how he made his money, he would keep working – he had to.

***

The following evening, Louis opened the front door of the house and was met by the sound of laughter and the smell of frying onions. He couldn’t help but smile. Carefully, he helped Phoebe out of her coat and shoes and then he called, “We’re home!” in the direction of the kitchen.

The laughter stopped and immediately three figures appeared in the doorway wearing looks crossed between excitement and cautiousness.

Daisy was the first to break into a run down the hallway but she drew to an abrupt halt just in front of her twin and looked at her closely.

“Take your time,” Louis said gently, “Phoebs is still quite sore.”

Daisy nodded at Louis and looked back her sister seriously. “Does it hurt loads?”

Phoebe scrunched up her nose and nodded. “Yeah, it really hurts but it’s better than it was before,” she said quietly.

“Can I give her a hug?” Daisy directed at Louis.

Louis smiled, “Of course, just don’t squeeze too tightly.”

Daisy beamed at her sister and then pulled her into a careful hug. By this point, Charlotte and Felicite had approached too and they both made a fuss of Phoebe who looked tired but also very pleased to be home.

When Louis looked up from where his sisters were chatting away and catching up, he found Harry standing in the doorway to the kitchen with a wooden spoon in his hand and a big smile on his face. He stepped away from the girls and wandered towards Harry, just as Daisy started asking if she could see Phoebe’s scar. For a brief moment, he imagined how it would feel to collapse against Harry’s chest and let him wrap his arms around him. He imagined how comforting it would feel to allow himself to sag against him and let all of the stress of the last few days be soothed away. Instead though, he stopped just in front of Harry and smiled at him softly.

Harry reached out and rubbed Louis’ upper arm, the smile still on his face.

“Dinner’s nearly ready,” he said quietly. “Give me ten minutes and I’ll be serving it up.”

“It smells delicious,” Louis replied. He checked over his shoulder and saw that the girls had all moved through to the living room so he followed Harry into the kitchen where Harry took up his position in front of the stove.

“Do you want me to do anything?” he asked as he leant back against the counter and watched Harry work.

“Nope, it’s all under control. The girls set the table and helped slice the peppers and onions, and I was just about to start the chicken when you got back. Daisy was doing her maths homework at the table when I got here but she was stuck so I helped her out. Well, I think I helped her out – Year 6 maths is a lot harder than I remember it being when I was in primary school,” Harry was happily talking as he focused on the chicken in the pan.

Louis was just watching him in awe. How had someone as good as Harry just stumbled into their lives?

“You’re perfect,” Louis muttered.

When Harry turned to face him with a beaming smile on his face, Louis blushed and looked down at his feet. He cleared his throat before he looked back up.

“Phoebe certainly thinks you’re amazing,” he said as he tried to move on from his previous comment. “I think she thinks you’re some sort of superhero or something. It might be to do with the part where you carried her into the hospital but she’s definitely impressed. She was so excited when I told her that you were joining us for tea tonight.”

Harry laughed brightly. “Do you think I’d look good in tights? And should I have a cape?”

“I’m not sure about the cape,” Louis said thoughtfully, “It might get in the way while you’re cooking - imagine if it caught on the hob.”

Harry sent him a sideways look with a raised eyebrow and hummed thoughtfully. “Maybe, but you didn’t comment on the tights.”

Louis was just wondering what a suitable response was when Daisy appeared at the kitchen doorway asking when the food would be ready because she was ‘starving’. Harry just laughed again as Louis muttered a comment about how she was obviously feeling at ease around Harry if she was being so cheeky. At least her timing was good though, as Harry announced that he was serving up and, with a shared smile between them, Louis disappeared to round up the rest of his sisters.

***

The meal had been a noisy affair as everybody chattered away. It was as though Harry had always been there with the way he fitted in so comfortably. Louis tried and failed to show Daisy how to roll up a fajita without the filling spilling everywhere and when he looked up, Harry was watching him with amusement and fondness displayed on his face.

The clearing up had been a team effort, with only Phoebe and Harry exempt from duties. Harry had protested that he was more than willing to help tidy up but Louis insisted that he stayed put. Louis had glanced over a few times as he worked to find Harry chatting away with Phoebe at the table, his little sister’s face split with a tired but happy smile.

With the kitchen clean and tidy, they all found themselves in the living room watching the television. Eventually, each of Louis’ sisters drifted away from the room, wishing the remaining occupants a goodnight, and heading up the stairs. Louis had accompanied Daisy and Phoebe wanting to make sure that Phoebe was settled for the night.

When it was just the two of them sitting beside one another on the sofa, they sat in silence for a while, watching a re-run of Top Gear without speaking. Then, Louis turned to Harry. “Thank you for everything you’ve done Harry. You have no idea…you don’t know how much it means to me…how grateful I am.” He trailed off chewing on his lower lip as he looked down at his knees. “I’m not…well, I suppose you’ve noticed that I’m not very good at accepting help. I don’t want you to think that I’m ungrateful…it’s just…I’ve had to deal with things on my own for a while now and…well, I find it hard to trust people. Like, why would you want to help me if you didn’t want something in return?”

“I don’t expect anything from you,” Harry said immediately. “That’s not why I’m here.”

Louis looked up at him instantly. “I know that…it took me a while to realise…but I believe that about you now. And it’s not that I don’t like you, it’s just...you can’t always trust people…and I didn’t know if I could trust you, but you’ve shown me that you’re a good person. You’re too good to be spending time with me.” Louis looked away again.

Harry reached out and placed a hand on his knee gently. “Hey, look at me Lou,” he said quietly. He waited patiently until Louis finally brought his eyes back up to meet Harry’s own. “You said earlier that I was like a superhero but I think it’s you that really needs that title. You’re a good person, maybe one of the best I’ve ever met.”

Louis shook his head slightly at that.

“I mean it,” Harry persevered. “I only have to look at how your sisters idolise you to know that you’re amazing. I don’t know what’s happened in the past, I don’t know how you’ve ended up in this situation, but I do know that you’re a _good_ person, no matter what you think of yourself.”

Louis chewed on his lower lip for a few long moments as he looked at Harry closely.

“Can I tell you?” he asked quietly.

The way he phrased the question almost seemed as though he wanted to check that Harry would be happy to listen to him, like he felt like he needed to check that it was alright that he talked about it.

Harry nodded slowly. “Of course you can,” he said equally quietly. “You can tell me anything, but only if you want to.”

“I do,” Louis confirmed. “I’m just not sure where to start.” He stared at the television for a while and drew in a deep breath before he turned back to face Harry. Twisting himself around, he drew his knee up towards his body and wrapped his arms around it.

“I suppose you’ve been wondering why I’m here with the girls like this,” he said once he was settled. “I know it’s not exactly a conventional family set-up.” He paused and looked down to fiddle with the hem of his jeans.

It was obvious to Harry that Louis was already struggling with how to explain what had happened in the past and he didn’t want him to feel pressured to tell him.

“Lou, if you’re not comfortable talking about this, you don’t have to, you know,” he said gently as he wrapped his hand around Louis’ where it was still picking at a thread on his trousers.

Louis stilled at the touch and looked up. His eyes looked sad but also determined. “I want to though,” he said. “It’s just…well, I haven’t ever told anyone this so I feel like I need to get it out but I’m just not sure how to.”

He hadn’t ever told anyone? Harry didn’t know how to feel about that. Honoured that Louis would choose him and trust him enough, but also terrified about what he might find out. He wasn’t sure he could cope with discovering the truth about why Louis suddenly looked so sad. But he forced that thought away: Louis had _lived_ through whatever it was, so Harry was going to have to toughen up and hear the story and support Louis in any way that he could.   

“Take your time,” Harry said simply.

Louis nodded and then drew in another deep breath. “My parents – my mum and my step-dad – they, um, they were killed…in a car crash…just over three years ago.”

Harry inhaled deeply. He had feared something like that. How else could their noticeable absence in their children’s lives be explained?

“I’m so sorry Lou,” Harry told him quietly.

Louis gave him a tight smile and nodded once before he continued. “They’d been together since I was little so my step-dad was my dad; I didn’t know my ‘real’ dad and from what my mum had told me it was better that way. I thought I was so grown-up, you know? Ready to take on the world. And then they died…and everything changed. Of course it was awful, the worst pain I’ve ever experienced, but I couldn’t just lock myself away and cry for days and days, I couldn’t be angry, I couldn’t wail about how unfair life was. Suddenly I was on my own and I had to take care of the girls. They were so devastated – the twins were only _seven_ – how was I supposed to tell them that mummy and daddy were gone and never coming back?” Louis paused and Harry could see that he was shaking. He threaded his fingers into Louis’ and squeezed his hand.

Louis looked at their joined hands for a long moment before he continued.

“We got through the funeral and had to start going through the motions of life but then I had, like, social services calling round and wanting to check on the girls. How were we coping? And, was I capable of looking after them? I knew what they were trying to do. They were going to say I couldn’t look after them and they were going to take them away.” He sounded so distressed at the mere thought of it, so angry that some strangers would come swooping in and take his only remaining family away. “I couldn’t let them do that. They’d just lost their parents…I couldn’t let them be separated and put into foster homes because someone thought I couldn’t cope. They’re _my_ family, no-one was taking them away.”

Harry wanted to point out that Louis had lost _his_ parents too – it almost seemed like he didn’t want to register that fact in the way he spoke. But he didn’t interrupt, he knew that Louis needed to tell his story in his own way.

“So I worked really hard to prove that we were alright and eventually the home visits stopped and the staff at the school stopped staring at me when I picked up the twins. I know that they were only doing their job, but we needed to be together. Taking them away only would’ve made things harder to deal with.

I actually thought I was lucky, because I’d been seeing this bloke, Tom, for a few months before the accident and when it happened, I half expected him to run for the hills, because who wants to deal with all that emotional baggage after they’ve only been with someone for a few months, right? But he didn’t leave. He stuck with me and I thought he was some sort of knight in shining armour, you know? But I guess I was wrong, because not long after the accident he started to change.”

Harry didn’t like the sound of where this was going.

“I suppose he knew how vulnerable I was…and he took advantage of that. He…um…well, he started…hurting me. And I didn’t know what to do. I was scared to report him because I thought that if the police were involved then social services would find out. He knew that of course, he was very clever – good at manipulation. He never went near the girls: they had no idea what was going on. He didn’t seem that interested in them to be honest.

Anyway, I found out that my parents had left the house to me and my sisters, and that they’d left a substantial amount of money in a fund for us. The mortgage on the house was paid off so we were able to stay here and the money meant that the girls could be looked after comfortably. But Tom found out about the money and…I don’t really know how he even managed it…he stole it. He went to the bank, withdrew the money and claimed it as his own.

I’d let him get away with a lot, but when I realised what he’d done I went mad. That money was for the girls, to support them. I stood up to him, I demanded that he gave it back, but he just…he just laughed in my face. He threatened me – said he’d kill me if I reported him, and then he told me that obviously he knew where we lived and if I didn’t let him go with the money…he said he’d hurt my sisters. I didn’t have a choice – he was a sadistic bastard and I believed him when he said that he’d hurt us.”

Harry’s eyes were wide as he listened to Louis’ story. He could hardly believe anyone could be so evil as to manipulate a person who had already been through so much. He could hardly believe that anyone would be able to hurt Louis. He was still squeezing Louis’ hand tightly, his large hand wrapped protectively around Louis’ smaller one.

“After he had disappeared from our lives, I tried to get back to normal. I had a job at a nightclub which meant I could be here when the girls needed me during the day and then go to work once they were tucked up in bed. It wasn’t ideal but it was the best I could get. The pay wasn’t great and I realised that I wasn’t earning enough to keep us going. I looked for other jobs, I took on extra shifts but it just wasn’t enough. I had five mouths to feed, clothes to buy, bills to pay.” Louis sighed deeply and seemed to stare into space for a while. He looked exhausted and he still looked so sad.

“One day Felicite came home and her school shoes were falling apart. I didn’t have any money to replace them and I went off to work that night with this awful panicked feeling in my chest that if she went to school with them on the next day someone would notice and report it. I had this awful thought that social services would come back round and say I was neglecting the girls.

When I finished my shift at the club, I set off for home but halfway there I just gave up. I remember sliding down the wall of a building and just sitting on the pavement crying.”

The sadness and despair of Louis’ story felt like a heavy weight in Harry’s own chest. He could picture Louis, his spirit broken, sobbing on the floor with no-one to help him.

“I don’t know how long I was there, but after a while this bloke approached me. I think he was drunk, but he offered me fifty quid if I’d give him a blow job. At first, I was going to tell him to fuck off but then he pulled the cash out of his pocket.”

Louis suddenly looked straight into Harry’s eyes and stared at him intently.

“You have to believe me that I didn’t want to do it,” he said quickly. “I was desperate…I didn’t know what else to do.”

“Hey,” Harry said as he ran his hand down Louis’ arm. “I’m not judging you, Lou. I understand why you did it. You should never have been put in that situation in the first place but I know that you didn’t have a choice.”

Louis sighed heavily and looked down at the sofa.

“I hoped it would be a one off,” he continued quietly. “But I soon realised that I couldn’t earn enough at the club so I had to do something else and it was obvious that I could make a lot more every night doing that. If I wanted to look after my family and keep us together, I had to work on the streets.  

The girls have no idea – they think I still work at the nightclub. I’d never want them to know. It makes me sick and I hate myself for it sometimes and I’d never want them to look at me and feel that. But mostly I hate myself for getting into this situation in the first place and letting them down.”

“Louis,” Harry interrupted him and Louis looked up at him sharply. He’d heard enough of Louis talking about himself so negatively. He’d heard enough of Louis blaming himself and thinking he wasn’t good enough. “You shouldn’t be ashamed of yourself. I totally understand why you wouldn’t want the girls to know, but you shouldn’t be ashamed of yourself for doing this for them. I don’t know many people who would sacrifice themselves like you have for the sake of their family. You’ve been through something truly horrendous and I can’t imagine how much you’ve suffered but throughout all of it you’ve fought to keep your family together and I admire you for that.”

Louis shook his head sadly and lowered his eyes again.

“You’re a _good_ person,” Harry repeated the words from earlier in the evening, desperately wanting Louis to believe him. “I don’t think I’ve ever met anyone as selfless as you.”

Even with his head bowed, Louis was shaking it slightly as though he couldn’t accept Harry’s words. But Harry wanted him to. He wondered if Louis had ever even had chance to properly grieve for his parents before he took on the responsibility of caring for his sisters. He wondered how Louis had managed to hold everything together even though his own heart must have been breaking at the loss of his parents. He wondered how Louis managed to keep going every day even after everything that had happened.

After a moment of just watching Louis, Harry leaned forward and pulled him into a tight embrace. It was the most physical contact that they had shared and for a moment Louis tensed in Harry’s arms before he sagged against him and allowed himself to be held.

“I’m so tired,” he sighed against Harry’s shoulder.

It wasn’t clear whether he meant just tonight or in general. Obviously, retelling his emotional story must have been incredibly draining. But Harry thought that his words probably referred to his whole life.

He rubbed his hand soothingly up and down Louis’ back a few times. “Do you want me to go so you can get some rest?” He didn’t really want to leave, but he also didn’t want to overstay his welcome if Louis wanted some space.

Louis leant back a little and looked into his eyes steadily. “No,” he said quietly, “Will you stay? Can we just stay here…like this?”

“Of course,” Harry replied easily. “Anything you want.”

***

The feeling of fingers gently stroking through his hair greeted Louis as he began to wake up. For a moment, he thought of his mum – it was just the sort of thing that she used to do when he was little. But he knew it wasn’t her; that was impossible. He wanted to keep his eyes closed so that the calming sensation would continue.

Remembering the night before, he thought about how he had told Harry everything: the whole mess of the last few years of his life had been explained. He had half expected Harry to get up and walk out the door when he discovered how much emotional baggage Louis had. But he shouldn’t have really been that surprised that Harry had stayed with him. He should have given Harry the credit he deserved and known that he wouldn’t abandon him.

It scared him a little to know that he had told Harry. He had shared something with him that he hadn’t ever told anyone else. All his secrets, all the things that kept him awake, all the worries that plagued his mind, all his fears of what might happen.

It scared him a lot to know that he trusted Harry enough to tell him.

Gradually, so very slowly, Harry had become a part of Louis’ life. He had become someone that Louis could lean on, someone that he _trusted_. There hadn’t been anyone like that for a long time. And that was quite a scary thought.

When he finally allowed his eyes to open, he found that his head was resting on Harry’s thighs, the blanket had been pulled from the back of the sofa and was draped over his legs. The fingers carding through his hair were Harry’s and, as Louis rocked his head to the side a little, he gazed up to see Harry smiling softly at him.

“Morning,” he said quietly. His voice was rough with sleep and Louis wondered how long he’d been awake himself.

“Morning,” he replied as he rubbed his eyes. He looked up at Harry and studied him for a while. “Did you sleep sitting up like that?” he suddenly asked.

“Um…yeah,” Harry shrugged.

Louis sat up immediately and turned to face him. “Oh my god, I’m so sorry…that’s terrible…you should’ve woken me up and…”

“Lou,” Harry cut him off, “It’s fine, really.” He pushed himself off the sofa and stretched, groaning as his back popped. “See,” he said as he let his arms hang loosely by his sides, “No problem. And I wasn’t going to wake you up, you looked far too cute.”

For just a moment, Louis imagined hopping off the sofa and pulling Harry in for a lazy morning kiss. He imagined being wrapped up in Harry’s strong arms as he laughed into the kiss. Quickly, he shook the thought from his head.

“I’m many things, but ‘cute’ is not one of them,” he retorted with his best sneer. “You won’t be invited round here anymore if you insult me again.”

Harry laughed lightly and took a step towards where Louis was still sitting on the sofa. “I apologise profusely,” he smiled down at him. “I didn’t want to disturb you because you looked like you really did need the sleep.” His smile had dropped into a softer one as he looked at Louis closely.

Louis blinked up at him slowly before he pushed himself up from the sofa and stood in front of Harry – only a small space between them. “Thank you,” he said quietly. “For letting me sleep…and for last night.”

“Anytime Lou,” Harry told him gently. “I’m here for you, you know.”

Neither of them moved for a long time, then Harry seemed to sway towards Louis. They suddenly seemed closer together. Their eyes were fixed on one another. Louis lifted his hand as though he was going to steady himself on Harry’s chest.

“Harry!”

The excited shout from the doorway of the lounge startled them and they stepped apart immediately. Both of them looked towards the owner of the voice with wide eyes.

Daisy beamed at them from the doorway. “What are you doing here Harry? Did you stay over?”

“We lost track of the time,” Louis said as he stepped towards her, smiling a little nervously. “We were talking and then it was too late for Harry to go home.”

“You said we’re not allowed friends over on school nights,” Daisy told him with a cheeky smile – too cheeky for a ten year old, a side effect of having Louis for an older brother probably, Harry thought to himself.

“Don’t be cheeky,” Louis told her as he steered her back into the hallway. “Are the others up yet?”

Daisy blew out a very put-upon sigh. “Lottie’s in the bathroom, Fizzy’s being grumpy already this morning and Phoebe gets to stay in bed because she’s not going back to school yet – it’s not fair.”

“I’m sure you’d rather be at school than have the pain that Phoebe’s had,” Louis told her as they wandered towards the kitchen. “What’ll it be for breakfast this morning?” he asked as Daisy settled herself at the table.

“Toast please,” Daisy replied as she flicked the TV on and focused her attention on that.

Harry was hovering in the doorway of the kitchen. He wasn’t sure whether he should leave or stick around for breakfast. Maybe it was better to slip away now before the other girls came down and starting asking more questions.

“D’you want a cuppa?” Louis asked, snapping Harry from his wondering. He had a gentle, private sort of smile of his face as he looked at him.

“Um, yeah, sure, that’d be lovely thanks,” Harry replied. His mind had been made up easily. Possibly because he couldn’t think of anywhere else he’d rather be.

***

It became normal for Harry to be at Louis’ house. If he wasn’t at university or working a shift at the bar, he was more often than not, spending time with Louis and his sisters. No-one had particularly invited him but it seemed obvious that he didn’t _need_ an invitation. He was completely welcome at the house and they all loved having him around.

On more than one occasion, Harry had sat with the twins working on their homework. Louis couldn’t help the way his heart jumped in his chest at the sight of the three of them sitting around the dining table puzzling over some piece of school work. He’d been an agony aunt for Felicite when she’d come home from school upset over some boy. And, despite Louis telling them that Harry wasn’t their personal taxi service, Harry had dropped Lottie off in town several times over the last few weeks.

Louis had feared that Harry would get sick of running around after them all the time and he was afraid of pushing Harry’s kindness too far, but Harry seemed quite content to spend time with all of them and quite happy to help out.  

While Louis could have tried to pretend that it was just nice to have another adult around the house, someone to share some of the responsibilities such as cooking with, he couldn’t deny that it was _Harry_ that he enjoyed having around. They seemed to be getting closer all the time. Since Louis had shared his story, he felt like he could trust Harry, he felt like they could talk freely, and he knew that Harry wasn’t judging him.

There was still a strange moment each evening, if Harry was there, when Louis would announce that he had to go to work. Of course Harry knew what that meant but they had come to some sort of unspoken agreement to avoid the issue completely. Louis still hated the thought of the girls ever knowing what he did to make money but now he had the same feeling about Harry having that knowledge. Obviously, Harry had known what Louis’ job was right from the beginning, but since they had started getting closer he hated the fact that Harry was aware of his ‘profession’. He knew that Harry didn’t judge him, but he couldn’t help but feel dirty every time he went off to work.  

It was almost getting to the point where Louis couldn’t imagine life without Harry. And that thought scared him quite a bit. Somewhere along the line, he’d let his defences down and let Harry get close. Not just to him but to his sisters as well. He hadn’t let anyone get close for a long time and now it seemed like Harry was becoming a permanent part of their lives. What scared him was the thought that one day Harry would walk away from him, from all of them. He’d tried to keep Harry at arm’s length, because he couldn’t believe that he’d want to stick around for long, but somehow Harry had managed to break down Louis’ resistance and settle himself quite comfortably in his life. And that was a scary prospect too.

***

It was a normal Thursday morning when Louis realised just how much he felt for Harry.

The girls had been rushing about getting their bags and shoes and coats ready for school. Lottie and Felicite were going to walk Daisy and Phoebe to school on their way in, leaving Louis at home to tidy up and then head up to bed to catch up on some sleep after a long night.

Harry had called round to join them for breakfast on his way in to university, delivering on his promise to make them pancakes one morning. He had offered to help Louis with the cleaning up but Louis had all but pushed him down the hallway towards the front door, reminding him that he couldn’t be late for his lectures.

“I’ve got plenty of time,” Harry protested as he pulled his shoes on near the front door.

“I run a tight ship around here, Styles,” Louis told him as he waved his tea-towel threateningly, a smirk pulling at his lips. “I won’t have anyone running late for important stuff like education.”

Harry laughed as he straightened up. “Believe me, I know. I’ve never seen anyone get four girls out of the door so promptly before.”

“I am the master and you may bow down to me and my superior methods,” Louis told him with a grin.

Harry chuckled again before he fell quiet and simply smiled at Louis fondly. For a long moment neither of them moved.

“You’d better go,” Louis said eventually. His voice was quieter than before and he took a step towards Harry to urge him out of the door.

Harry cleared his throat and nodded once before he turned around, only to turn back suddenly without warning. Louis almost collided with him as he’d been moving towards the door and they were suddenly incredibly close, almost chest to chest. They’d shared plenty of touches recently: shoulders brushing together as they sat on the sofa, a gentle pat on the back, a reassuring rub on the arm. But this was different. They were in each other’s space completely, practically breathing the same air. Louis could make out the flecks of different shades of green in Harry’s eyes.

It was Louis that moved first. He leant up ever so slightly and pressed his lips softly against Harry’s.

His heart was hammering in his chest and for a split second he wondered if he’d made a terrible mistake, but then Harry’s hand was on his cheek, the other resting on his waist, holding him so gently as he returned the kiss.

Louis didn’t want it to end. Forget about Harry being late, he never wanted him to leave.

Slowly, they parted and Harry rested his forehead against Louis’. Both of them kept their eyes closed for a few moments.

Louis swallowed thickly. “You need to go,” he whispered when he opened his eyes.

Harry groaned lowly. “I could stay.”

Louis smiled and breathed out a quiet laugh. “You could,” he replied quietly, “But then you’d be late, and you know how I feel about that.”

Again Harry groaned but he straightened up and took a tiny step backwards. “Fine, fine, I’ll go,” he sighed, but there was a smile pulling at his mouth.

“Have a good day,” Louis said.

“You too,” Harry replied. “Oh, wait…” he said before he’d made it out of the door. He leaned towards Louis again and gave him another quick kiss, before he pulled back with a bright grin and finally walked through the door.

With a dopey smile on his face, Louis pushed the door closed behind Harry. He started walking back towards the kitchen to finish tidying up but then he stopped suddenly. His eyes widened and he blinked rapidly a few times. He’d _kissed_ Harry. And Harry had kissed him back. Oh god, they’d _kissed_. And Louis couldn’t remember feeling so much from such a simple brush of lips ever before. It hit him then, as he stood in the hallway with a tea-towel in his hands – he loved Harry, he was _in love_ with Harry. He didn’t know whether to laugh hysterically or run upstairs, lock himself in his bedroom and never come out again. Obviously the second option wasn’t practical, so hysterical laughter it had to be. 

When he’d eventually pulled himself together, he’d finished clearing up in the kitchen and headed up to his bedroom to get some sleep. He lay in his bed, staring at the ceiling for a long time, sleep refusing to come. He’d calmed down but his thoughts were still racing, everything revolving around the fact that he’d fallen for Harry. He couldn’t believe that he hadn’t realised before. He was simultaneously looking forward to Harry coming back later and dreading that he’d walk in and see love hearts in Louis’ eyes.

If he’d been scared by how Harry had become such an important part of his life before, now he was absolutely terrified.

***

In just the same way that Harry had seamlessly slotted himself into Louis’ world, kissing him seemed to be something else that easily became part of Louis’ life. It just seemed like it was meant to be somehow. Not that Louis saw it as routine – far from it. Every time Harry would lean towards him, his heart rate would pick up and butterflies would flutter in his stomach. It didn’t matter whether it was a chaste kiss on the cheek as Harry left the house or a deeper, more passionate kiss that left Louis wanting more – every time he was left grinning like a fool.

Louis had been a little concerned about how the girls might react. They knew he was gay, but the last boyfriend he’d had had been Tom and that was quite a while ago so they hadn’t seen Louis with another man for some time. Not that Harry was his ‘boyfriend’ – in fact he didn’t know how to define their relationship and that was something else that worried him because he didn’t know how to explain it to his sisters. So, for their benefit and to avoid any awkward questions, they’d tried to keep it quiet. But that plan had failed because Louis couldn’t resist stealing a kiss in the kitchen one evening just as Charlotte had walked in. She’d seemed completely unflustered by what she saw and as they looked at her guiltily, like _they_ were the children caught up to no good, she’d raised her eyebrows, laughed and said she’d thought they were more than friends for ages.

Later on, when Harry had left, she’d told Louis how nice it was to see him looking so happy and he’d been unable, and unwilling, to stop the smile that spread across his face.

***

“Lou…I’ve, um, got something I wanted to talk to you about,” Harry said as they finished clearing up in the kitchen.

The girls had all disappeared to their rooms once the majority of the jobs were done, leaving Harry and Louis alone.

Louis looked up at Harry and saw him leaning against the counter looking a little nervous. He smiled at him reassuringly and wandered closer to stand just in front of him. “Go for it,” he said with a nod.

Harry reached out and took one of Louis’ hands in his own. He looked him in the eyes as he started to speak. “Well, the thing is, um, after you told me about what had happened to you - with your ex – I couldn’t stop thinking about it…about what he’d done to you. And, well, I didn’t think he should be allowed to get away with it.”

Louis’ smile had fallen away as Harry spoke and a frown had replaced it. He didn’t know where Harry was going with his little speech but a creeping sense of dread was starting to twist its way through his body.

“What he did to you – hurting you and stealing your money and leaving you to have to do what you do – well, that’s not right,” Harry continued, “So, I mentioned it to a friend of mine to see what could be done about it.”

“What friend?” Louis asked. His voice sounded strange to his own ears, a mixture of panic setting in and disbelief that Harry had done something like this.

“Well, he works for the police,” Harry said slowly.

Tremors had started shaking Louis’ entire body. He pulled his hand out of Harry’s and took a step backwards. “Why…what…what were you thinking?” he asked, when he finally managed to get his words out. “Why didn’t you tell me?”

“I didn’t want to tell you before I knew whether or not he could help. I didn’t want to get your hopes up,” Harry told him.

Louis just stared at him for a long moment before he shook his head. “You had no right to do that,” he said angrily. “You went behind my back and told some stranger about…about me…about something that I trusted you with.”

“But I did it for you,” Harry said desperately. He pushed himself away from the counter and took a step towards Louis, only for Louis to shake his head again and move away. “I know that you hate what you have to do to look after your family and I thought that if we could get your money back from him, you could stop working on the streets.”

“But I _told_ you what he was like,” Louis said. “I told you that he’d come after us if I reported him. I told you that I was worried about social services finding out. And you still went ahead and did it anyway. You’ve put my sisters in danger…and what for? So you can be a _hero_ and save me? I told you Harry, I’m not a fucking charity case. I can’t believe you’ve done this.”

“I just wanted to help,” Harry said miserably. “And my friend’s promised he’ll be subtle about it, I wouldn’t have done it if I had any doubts about your safety.”

Louis huffed out a bitter laugh. “Promises don’t count for much I’m afraid.”

Harry could hardly believe his eyes or what he was hearing. It was like Louis had reverted back to the man that Harry had first encountered all those months ago in the space of a few minutes: his defences had gone up instantly and he was pushing Harry away.

“You don’t have to do everything on your own, Lou. Why won’t you let me help you? You can _trust_ me,” Harry said desperately.

Louis’ face suddenly became blank. The anger was gone but it seemed to have been replaced by something much worse. “No…I can’t,” he said quietly.

“Lou…” Harry started but was cut off.

“I told you about the worst parts of me because I _thought_ I could trust you. I thought you understood. But you went behind my back,” Louis’ voice sounded completely hollow. “I didn’t want your help because I never wanted to feel like I owed you anything. I didn’t want it to be like that for us. And all this time you’ve spent here, I was justifying it to myself that it was okay because you wanted to be here. I was kidding myself that it was on my terms and I’d asked you to be here. But this…I never asked for your help with this.”

“You don’t _owe_ me anything,” Harry told him. “That’s not how it works when you care about someone. You don’t keep track of who’s done what and who has a debt to repay.”

Louis just looked down at his feet.

“Do the girls owe _you_ then?” Harry asked. He knew there was a sharp edge to his voice but he was just so scared that he was on the verge of losing Louis.

Louis’ head snapped up and he narrowed his eyes at Harry.

“By your reasoning, they owe you for everything that you’ve done for them. And that’s complete bullshit, Louis. When you love someone you’ll do anything for them, no matter what, and you never ask for anything in return.”

“You should go,” Louis said, so quietly that Harry nearly missed it.

Harry shook his head quickly and took a step closer to Louis again. He reached for Louis’ hand and held it in both of his as he tried to reason with him. “Please don’t do this, Louis. Don’t push me away. I’m sorry that I didn’t tell you what I was going to do – I just wanted to help. But please…please don’t do this.”

Louis’ eyes were sad as he looked up at Harry. He slowly pulled his hand from Harry’s grasp. He was still shaking. “Please…just go,” he whispered.

For a long moment, Harry just stared back at Louis. He couldn’t seem to process what was happening. He’d expected that Louis might be a little annoyed with him but he had thought that everything would be alright once he had explained. He had never imagined that he would react quite so angrily. He felt tears prickling at his eyes as he looked at Louis. There was nothing he could say right now that would change Louis’ mind. Maybe if he gave him some space and some time to think it over things would be okay.

With one final sad look at Louis and without saying anything else, Harry turned and walked out of the kitchen.

When Louis heard the front door close quietly, he slumped into one of the chairs at the dining table. Then he put his head in his hands and he cried quietly.

***

It had been a strange couple of weeks for Harry. He hadn’t heard anything from Louis and hadn’t seen him since he’d left the house after their fight. He had sent him texts and tried to call him but never received any response. He hadn’t even seen Louis on the street when he’d been on his way home from work.

His routine of lectures, uni work and shifts at the bar didn’t seem enough to fill his days anymore and he missed the busyness of Louis’ home, he missed the chatter of the girls and, more than anything, he missed Louis.

He had never dreamt that Louis would push him away so completely. And it felt like torture. Louis had left a massive hole in his life and in his heart.

***

His sisters had been full of curious questions about where Harry was the day after Louis had told him to leave. Louis hadn’t told them anything in detail. It seemed far too painful to say out loud that he had told Harry to go and fully expected to never see him again, so he had merely fobbed them off with a lie about how Harry was busy.

After several days of pretending that everything was fine, he felt worn out and empty. He felt hollow and frayed around the edges and his patience was stretched to breaking point.

When the twins had continued asking about Harry’s absence, because he had promised to help them finish their homework project, Louis had snapped at them angrily. Harry was gone, he wasn’t coming back, and they should stop asking about him because Louis didn’t want to hear his name anymore.

Both Daisy and Phoebe had looked at him in wide-eyed shock. It was hard to tell whether it was because he’d shouted at them so uncharacteristically or because they were sad about Harry, but when Phoebe’s bottom lip wobbled and she scurried out of the kitchen with Daisy hot on her heels, Louis felt like the worst person in the world.

All four of the girls had been quiet at dinner that night and Louis couldn’t even bring himself to try to force a conversation.

Charlotte had pulled him into a tight hug and held on to him for a long time before she went up to bed. She looked at him sadly but didn’t say anything when she let him go. For a moment, Louis considered telling her what had happened. He needed someone to talk to. But he couldn’t. She was too young to be dealing with the problems that Louis faced. He was alone and the only person he felt he could talk to was the one person who he refused to speak to anymore.

After his parents had died, Louis’ life had altered so dramatically. His friends had been supportive and helped him out in the early days but gradually they’d drifted away and moved on with their lives because they didn’t have responsibilities like Louis had now. A lot of them had gone off to university which had always been Louis’ plan. He had always wanted to be a teacher but he had willingly sacrificed his dream in order to look after his family.

The few friends that had kept in touch had been pushed away by Louis’ relationship with Tom. His closest friends hadn’t been fans of Tom and had tried to make Louis see sense about him before things went too far. But Louis, in his grief-stricken, vulnerable state, hadn’t been able to see what was right in front of him and just how poisonous Tom really was. As a result, it was his friendships that suffered and, unsurprisingly, Tom had ensured that Louis was more isolated than ever by encouraging him to forget about his friends because ‘they just didn’t understand’.  
When Louis had started working as a prostitute, he had been glad that his friends weren’t around anymore. He didn’t want to have to lie to anyone else. And he couldn’t face the thought of what they would think of him if they knew the truth.

But as he sat on the sofa before he went to work that evening, he realised that he _needed_ someone to talk to. He couldn’t do this alone anymore. Having Harry in his life had shown him that things were easier when you had someone to talk to. Even though he couldn’t bring himself to contact Harry because he still felt betrayed by him, he could reach out to someone else.

He scrolled through his phone and found the name he was looking for. Nervous butterflies fluttered in his stomach and he nearly talked himself out of it. But he didn’t. He dialled the number and waited. He briefly wondered if he even had the right number anymore but then a familiar, yet cautious sounding, voice answered.

“Liam?” Louis managed to croak out.

There was a rush of breath at the other end of the line. “Louis? Is that you?”

“Yeah…yeah it is,” Louis said. “I…um…I’m sorry to call you out of the blue like this…I know it’s been a long time.”

“I told you to call whenever you wanted, Lou,” Liam said, and his voice sounded almost sad but still fond. “I am surprised though,” he added.

“I’m sorry,” Louis said quietly. He could already feel tears pricking at his eyes and he wondered when he’d gone from being able to hold everything together so well to this emotionally unstable person.

“Don’t apologise,” Liam told him gently. “Do you want to talk about it?”

It seemed like maybe Liam had been waiting a long time for this conversation.

Louis drew in a deep breath and started to talk.

***

Things had been slightly better since Louis had made the decision to contact Liam. He had got a lot of things off his chest. His fear that Liam would be disgusted with him had been wiped away by Liam’s reassurances.

A few days after the phone call, Liam had turned up on Louis’ doorstep, accompanied by another of Louis’ old friends, Zayn, and the three of them had shared a rather emotional reunion. It wasn’t perfect and Louis still wondered what his friends must have really thought of him but it was a step in the right direction.

Things were slightly better.

And then things improved even more, because Louis received a text message from an unknown number telling him that a large amount of money was being deposited into his bank account. It seemed too good to be true. But when Louis checked his bank account, sure enough, the money had been transferred to him. The exact amount that Tom had stolen from him. At first, he was concerned about the repercussions of such an event. He was scared that at any moment, Tom was going to turn up on his doorstep and start kicking off, angry that Louis had apparently reported him. But after a few days with no sign of him, it became clear that no such thing was going to happen. Apparently, Tom was just a coward who had willingly handed back the money as soon as he’d been threatened by someone on Louis’ side. Louis had resolved to push thoughts of Tom from his mind; he never wanted to think about him and what he had done ever again.   

So things were definitely getting better but something was still not right in Louis’ life.

The problem was the hole that Harry had left.

Reuniting with his friends was wonderful and getting the money back meant that Louis could give up working on the streets and find a normal job, but he still missed Harry terribly. And, Louis had to admit, that Harry was the reason why things had improved in his life all of a sudden. Harry had helped Louis realise that he didn’t have to deal with everything on his own – he had broken down his defences and helped Louis in so many ways - which, in turn, had led to Louis reconnecting with his friends. And, Harry had been responsible for Louis getting his money back from Tom. Although he had been angry at Harry for going behind his back, he couldn’t deny that his idea had worked – the money sitting in his bank account was proof of that.       

He just didn’t know what to do anymore. He didn’t even know if Harry would still want him after everything that had happened.

***

“I’ve got a job,” Lottie announced after their other sisters had all gone up to their bedrooms.

Louis just looked at her in shock for a long moment. “What do you mean?” he asked. “What about school?”

Louis had worked too hard to support the girls and encourage them with their school work to allow his sixteen year old sister to simply leave school.

Lottie laughed a little. “Calm down,” she said with a chuckle. “It’s only a Saturday job. I might get offered some extra hours after school a few nights a week too. It’s at a hair salon in town.”

Louis breathed a quiet sigh of relief. He wasn’t sure if he had the energy to argue with Charlotte about the pros and cons of staying in school. “Well, that’s great news then. But you can’t let it get in the way of school, especially with your A–levels.”

“It’s just a part time job, Lou,” she said as she smiled at him as though he was acting like an old man. “And anyway, I thought it was time I started helping out.”

“What do you mean?” Louis asked again.

“You’ve done so much for all of us. After…after mum and dad died, you held us all together – in so many ways. You work so hard. And I want to help. I know I won’t be earning that much but I’m not a kid anymore and I want to help where I can.”

Louis wanted to tell her that she _was_ still a kid, she’d _always_ be his little sister, but he knew that she was growing up and that she was being earnest in her desire to help, so he didn’t want to detract from the sentiment.

“You know that you girls are the most important people in the world to me,” he said. “I’ll always take care of you and I don’t regret a single thing that I’ve done to keep us together as a family.”

When Charlotte looked at him questioningly, he realised that his words had wandered into dangerous territory and invited questions that he wasn’t willing to answer, so he ploughed on. “But I know that you’re getting older and you realise that running a house with five people isn’t easy and certainly isn’t cheap. I appreciate you wanting to help out, and you already do – a lot. You’ve grown up a lot faster than some people your age and you’re much more responsible. How about you just use the money you earn to buy the stuff you want? Like if you need some new clothes or something, instead of asking me for the money, you could buy your own. Unless of course it’s urgent and you’ve got like a hole in your shoe or something.”

Lottie shook her head and rolled her eyes. Louis wondered for a moment just how much he’d influenced his younger sisters while he’d been their guardian.

“That hardly sounds like I’m helping out, Lou,” she said doubtfully.

“Of course it is,” Louis argued. “If I’m not having to buy you stuff then it means there’s extra money for all the other things we need.”

“Okay,” Charlotte agreed slowly. “I really do want to help out, you know.”

Louis smiled fondly. “You already do…I’m proud of you, kiddo.”

For a split second it looked like Charlotte was going to roll her eyes at him again, but then she moved towards Louis suddenly and pulled him into a tight embrace.

Louis squeezed her back equally as tightly and released a long breath.

“I’m going to head up,” Charlotte said when she released her brother.

“Okay, I’ll see you in the morning,” Louis replied.

Charlotte hesitated at the doorway. “Lou…um…Daisy and Phoebs have been working on this homework project for a couple of weeks…it’s on the table and I thought that maybe you might want to have a look at it before they hand it in tomorrow. They’ve worked really hard on it.”

“Sure. Of course I will,” Louis agreed easily. He was always happy to look at his sisters’ school work, especially if it was something they were really proud of.

“Um…well, I know things have been weird for a few weeks and you’ve been, um, missing Harry,” Charlotte was speaking quickly now, like she was worried about how Louis might react. “But you should know that he was helping them with it, before he went away.”

Louis swallowed thickly and nodded a couple of times.

“Alright, well, night then,” Charlotte said with a tiny smile.

“Night,” Louis replied quietly.

It took a while before he moved from the living room and into the kitchen. On the table, there was what looked like a book made out of thick coloured paper tied together with bright string looped through holes at the side. Louis moved closer, pulled out a chair and sat down at the table. He pulled the book closer and looked at the front cover.

_‘Our Hero’ by Daisy and Phoebe Tomlinson, Class 6T_.

The words were written in bubble writing and there was an excessive amount of glitter all over the front. When Louis opened the book, his hands were immediately covered in glitter and it crunched slightly as he carefully tried to open it wider. He smiled to himself immediately and wondered at what age people lost their desire to cover everything in glitter – maybe they never really did.

The first page of the book was green and Louis recognised his sisters’ neat, joined-up handwriting immediately. Their writing was better than his own, even if they were using brightly coloured felt-tip pens.

_Our class project this half-term was to show the class who our hero was and explain why we had chosen them. We asked Mrs Turner if we could work together because we both wanted to do our project about the same person._

_Our hero is our big brother Louis!_

Louis bit his lip as his eyes widened. He turned the page and was immediately met with a picture of himself grinning widely as he wrapped his arms around the twins.

_A few years ago our mum and dad died in an accident. It was really sad and we knew that we were going to miss them a lot. But our brother Louis made sure that we were alright._

There was already a lump forming in Louis’ throat as he read the words. He slowly turned the page again. This time there was a picture of Louis in their kitchen, standing at the cooker. It hit him suddenly that Harry had taken the picture on his phone. Louis had shaken his head in bewilderment when he’d heard the shutter sound and asked Harry why on earth he’d want a picture of him cooking. Harry had merely shrugged and then distracted him with a kiss.

_Louis was really brave. He decided that he wanted to look after us, even though there are four of us to take care of. He even learnt how to cook! He thinks he isn’t very good at it but he really is._

Louis smiled shakily at his sisters’ description and turned the page. Another photograph, this time of Louis fast asleep on the sofa – Harry must have taken that too.

_He works so hard all the time. He makes sure that we all get up and get ready for school every day. He takes care of us all the time. When I was poorly he made sure I got to the hospital and he helped me to be brave even though I was really scared. Sometimes he gets tired because he’s been so busy but he always says he doesn’t mind because it’s worth it._

Another page turned and another photograph was displayed. This time, Louis was shocked to see a picture of the whole family. It was the same picture that they had on the wall in the hallway, from their family holiday.

_We still miss our mum and dad and we still get sad that we won’t ever see them again. Charlotte and Felicite get sad too sometimes. Louis is always there to make us feel better though. We think that he gets sad sometimes too but he is always very brave in front of us and doesn’t let us see. He cheers us up and makes us laugh even when we feel sad._

A tear finally rolled down Louis’ face as he read the words and looked at the photograph.

He continued turning the brightly coloured pages; reading about the things his sisters thought were amazing and their reasons for why he was their hero, and looking at photographs and drawings that the girls had added.

Finally, he turned a page and realised that he was at the end of the book. There was a collage of photographs on the final page; all of them featuring him and various combinations of his sisters.

_Lots of people think heroes should have super powers. Lots of people choose famous people like footballers to be their hero. Our hero doesn’t need to be famous or be able to fly because he’s braver and kinder and more special than anyone else. He deserves to be called a hero because he loves us and we love him lots and lots._

_We hope you have enjoyed reading our book._

_By Daisy and Phoebe Tomlinson_

There were smiley faces and hearts drawn at the bottom of the page.

Louis choked out a sob as he closed the book. He did a double-take as he looked at the back cover. In small writing at the bottom of the page it said:

_Photographs_ (the word had been crossed out and corrected) _by Harry Styles_.

Louis would have hugged the book to his chest if he hadn’t been worried that he would ruin it, or knock all the glitter off, or wet it with his tears.

Eventually, he pulled himself together enough to go upstairs. He pushed the door to Daisy and Phoebe’s room open slowly and looked at them fondly.

“Lou?” he heard whispered. It was Daisy.

“Sorry love, did I wake you?” Louis replied quietly.

“No,” she replied. “I couldn’t get to sleep.”

Louis frowned. “Why not?” he asked, as he stepped further into the room until he could sit on the edge of her bed.

“I dunno,” she shrugged. She looked at him closely in the dim light spilling into the room through the door. “Why have you got glitter on your face?” She reached up and rubbed at his cheek.

Louis swallowed thickly. “I’ve been looking at your homework project – I hope you don’t mind.”

Daisy’s eyes widened a little and she looked across at her still sleeping sister. “Did you like it?” she asked quietly, almost timidly.

Louis wrapped his arm around her and squeezed her tightly. “I loved it,” he said softly as he placed a kiss on the top of her head.

“Why have you been crying then?” Daisy asked as she looked up at him.

Louis sighed. “Happy tears,” he said gently.

“You can be sad, you know. You don’t always have to pretend for us,” she told him seriously and Louis was floored by how grown up she sounded. “We know that you get sad about mum and dad. And we know that you’re sad about Harry.”

Louis opened his mouth to interrupt her.

“We miss him, but you miss him even more than us,” she continued without letting him speak. “I wish you’d make friends with him.” The way she said it made it sound so simple. “He made you smile. He made you happy, like _really_ happy, not like you were pretending, and you should be happy, Lou.”

He blinked at her rapidly a few times. There was something about the way children explained things that was so honest and obvious.

“Thank you, sweetheart,” he said. He pressed another kiss to her hair before he stood up.

Daisy snuggled back down into her bed and yawned widely. “Nighty, night.”

“Sleep tight,” Louis replied, before he slipped back out of the door.

As he made his way down the stairs, back to the living room, he made a decision. He needed to speak to Harry.

***

When Louis arrived outside Harry’s door the next day, he realised that it was only the second time he’d ever been there. The first time had been when Harry had taken him back there when he’d found Louis roughed up on the street. Since then Louis hadn’t been back. Harry had always come to Louis’ home. Harry had always come to Louis. Louis knew that it was about time that that changed and, with that in mind, he’d knocked on the door.

It wasn’t Harry that pulled the door open but a brightly smiling blonde man. That caught Louis off guard a little but he quickly gathered himself.

“Um, hi, is Harry home?” he asked.

“Sorry mate, he’s not here,” the man replied. The Irish accent told Louis that this was Harry’s flatmate, Niall.

It was impossible to hide the disappointment that Louis felt and he visibly sank a little where he stood.

“Are you…Louis?” Niall asked.

Louis’ eyes widened and he tensed a little. He had no idea what Harry had told his flatmate about him.

“Um, yeah, I am. And I’m guessing you’re Niall,” he replied.

“That’s me,” Niall nodded but his smile had dimmed a little. “Look, it’s probably none of my business but I just…well Harry’s a good mate of mine and, I should probably stay out of it, but he’s been pretty cut up about you. He wouldn’t tell me what had gone on between you, but all I know is that one day he’s walking on cloud nine and telling me how great you are and then the next day he’s a mess.”

“That’s not what I wanted,” Louis blurted out.

Niall nodded once again. “Whatever you came here for…well, he’s a good bloke, one of the best mates I’ve ever had and he deserves to be happy.”

Louis might have laughed at the similarities between Niall’s words and what Daisy had said to him the night before if he didn’t feel so nervous.

“I know,” Louis said quietly. “Will you tell him I called round? I’ll, um, I’ll ring him or something. I just wanted…I wanted to see him.”

Niall smiled and looked at Louis thoughtfully. “I’ll tell him,” he said. “Bye Louis.”

Louis raised a hand and gave a sort of half-wave before he walked back down the hallway.

***

The following day, Louis found himself on the university campus. It was a totally unfamiliar setting but he easily blended in with the other students milling about. Louis had always been fascinated by Harry’s descriptions of his university and had paid close attention to every detail, secretly wishing that he’d had chance to attend himself, so now he could almost figure out where he was heading based on Harry’s words. He had remembered Harry’s schedule of lectures so he had arrived in time for the end of Harry’s morning session.

When he’d got home after his disappointing trip to Harry’s flat, Louis had decided that he didn’t want to talk to Harry on the phone or send him a text. He needed to _see_ him and talk to him face to face. So (he hoped his plan didn’t make him look like a creepy weirdo) he had made his way to the campus to try to talk to Harry after his lecture.

Using a combination of Harry’s descriptions, following signs and eventually asking a couple of students, Louis found himself in a courtyard which several lecture halls seemed to open out into. He sat down on a vibrantly coloured bench and fidgeted nervously as he waited.

Soon the courtyard began to fill up with students and Louis wondered if he’d actually even be able to spot Harry in amongst the crowd. But then he was there. Messenger bag slung over his shoulder, coffee cup in his hand and a pen hanging out of his mouth, as he exited from a door at the other side of the courtyard. He smiled and waved at a couple of fellow students before setting off.

Louis felt his heart thudding in his chest as he pushed himself up and through the crowd.

Harry was heading away from the throng of people and towards the car park. His long legs were carrying him at a pace that meant Louis nearly had to break into a jog to catch up with him.

Once they were clear of the buildings, Louis called out. “Harry!”

Harry came to an abrupt halt and spun around. His eyes roamed up and down Louis’ body quickly as he pulled the pen out of his mouth. “Lou?” he seemed totally shocked. “What…what are you doing here?”

Louis took a small step towards him and drew in a deep breath. “I wanted to see you. I…I wanted to talk to you…face to face, not over the phone.”

Harry was still looking at him in surprise. “So you came here to wait for me?” he asked.

For a moment, Louis wondered whether he had overstepped some boundary. Maybe he shouldn’t have just shown up unannounced and caught Harry off guard like this. “I hope you don’t mind. Um, I called round to your flat yesterday and you weren’t there and I didn’t want to just, like, text you out of the blue after I hadn’t been in touch with you and I probably should have tried calling you but I just really wanted to see you so we could talk properly…”

“Lou,” Harry interrupted his breathless rambling. “It’s okay.” He had taken a step closer to Louis so that they were only a few feet apart now. “Of course I don’t mind you being here. You just surprised me – that’s all. I wasn’t expecting to see you here.”

Louis inhaled deeply and looked up at Harry. “Is it…can we, um, talk?” he asked hesitantly.

Harry nodded quickly. “Not here though. I’m done for the day anyway so I was heading back to the flat but we can go back to yours if you’d prefer.”

Louis shook his head and smiled slightly, relieved that Harry was still willing to speak to him. “We can go to your place – if you’re sure that’s alright.”

“It’s fine, Lou,” Harry said. “My car’s in the car park,” he said as he gestured over his shoulder.

Louis took that as his cue to move, so they began walking.

***

The journey back to Harry’s flat had been mostly quiet and both Louis and Harry were thankful that the traffic was light so they made it back fairly quickly. Neither of them wanted to start the conversation in the car so they had made small talk (which just seemed odd) and listened to the radio.

They stood in Harry’s kitchen as he prepared two cups of tea. As he handed the mug to Louis, their eyes met and Louis had to speak before the awkward silence stretched on for any longer.

“I’m so sorry, Harry,” he said quietly.

Harry’s eyebrows rose and his eyes widened in surprise. “I’m pretty sure that I was supposed to be saying that,” he replied.

Louis shook his head quickly. “No, no…I’m the one who needs to apologise.” He put the mug on the counter and took a step towards Harry before he stopped himself. “The way I reacted…” he took a deep breath and tried again. “You were only trying to help and…I freaked out…you must think I’m such an ungrateful bastard. And I’m sorry. I’m sorry that I threw your kindness back in your face like that.”

It was Harry’s turn to shake his head. “I don’t blame you for reacting like you did. I don’t blame you for being angry with me. You trusted me and I went behind your back. And _I’m_ sorry for that. You had every right to be angry.”

“Even if I did,” Louis argued, “I shouldn’t have pushed you away like I did. I shouldn’t have completely cut you out of my life just because I was upset.”

“Can I ask,” Harry started and then looked at Louis slightly hesitantly. “Can I ask _why_ you did? Why did you push me away?” He looked sad as he spoke.

As Louis looked at Harry, he knew that he owed him the truth. And more than that, he _wanted_ to tell him the truth. Even if Harry told him that there was no chance for them after what had happened, Louis wanted to tell him how he felt.

“When we first met, I thought you just wanted some sort of project to make you feel good about yourself. I didn’t think it was possible for someone to be so genuinely kind and good without having some ulterior motive. But the more I got to know you, the more I realised that you were just a wonderful person.

I didn’t want to let you in…I didn’t want to let you get close to me because I was scared – absolutely fucking terrified I suppose – of what it might mean. I’d been dealing with everything on my own for a long time and I didn’t think I needed anyone else. I wasn’t happy but I didn’t think that anyone would be able to make me feel happy because I didn’t deserve to be – not after what I’d become. I was a prostitute, Harry. I worked on the street and I sold my body to whoever was willing to pay. I just didn’t know why someone as wonderful as you would want to spend any time with someone like _me_. 

But you…you just, like, slotted into my life like you were supposed to be there. And I _wanted_ you to be there and that was so scary for me because I thought that one day I’d probably lose you too.

And then when you told me that you’d told your friend about me…I panicked I suppose. It wasn’t rational…but I felt like you’d let me down. I was angry with myself more than anything because I’d let you in and told you my story when I’d kept it so closely guarded for so long. It was like I thought, ‘that serves you right for thinking that you deserve to be happy’. For some reason, in my head, I thought that it was for the best because why would someone like you want _me_ anyway?

So, it was easier to push you away completely because at least that way I wouldn’t risk getting hurt again. But that was so stupid because it hurt anyway. I missed you so much. I was an idiot to think that it wouldn’t hurt if I didn’t see you, because of course it fucking did. I missed you all the time.” He trailed off quietly and then sighed deeply. He looked down and fiddled with the hem of his t-shirt, almost afraid to see what might be in Harry’s eyes if he looked at him.

Harry had listened to every word intently. There had been moments when he’d wanted to jump in and tell Louis how wrong he was. _Of course_ Harry wanted him, _of course_ Louis deserved to be happy, but he hadn’t interrupted: Louis needed to get everything out.

Slowly, he pushed himself away from the kitchen counter and stepped closer to Louis. He stood right in front of him and eventually Louis looked up to meet his gaze. Harry looked deep into his eyes.

“All I ever wanted was to be there for you,” he said softly. “I wanted to look after you, not because you needed me to but because I _wanted_ to. I wanted to be with you. I _still_ want to be with you.”

Louis drew in a shuddering breath. “You scare me so much, Harry…because I’m totally in love with you,” he whispered.

Harry surged forward as soon as the words had fallen from Louis’ lips. He held Louis’ face gently in his hands and kissed him passionately. Louis melted into the kiss immediately; it was all he’d wanted, and denied himself, for so long.

Harry pulled back suddenly. He looked into Louis’ eyes. “I love you too,” he said, almost desperately. “I’m _in love_ with you.” He pressed another kiss to Louis’ lips. “I know what you’ve had to do to survive and I would never judge you for that – it doesn’t change how I feel about you, it doesn’t change who you are. I love you Louis, and I don’t want you to be afraid of that, of us,” he murmured against Louis’ lips. “You deserve to be loved.”

Louis closed the gap between them after Harry’s words. Everything he felt for Harry seemed to be bubbling right at the surface of his mind, heart and body and he desperately tried to pour it all into the kiss. Everything around them, all the stress and upset of the last few weeks, seemed to fade away and it felt like the whole world seemed to be centred around the two of them standing in Harry’s kitchen kissing passionately.

Only when Louis’ lower back hit the edge of the counter did he realise that Harry had been walking him backwards towards it. They were pressed together completely and Louis arched his hips forward, moaning low in his throat at the feeling of friction.

When Harry broke away for air, breathing deeply against Louis’ neck for a moment, Louis caught a glimpse of how Harry’s lips seemed more red than usual and how his eyes seemed almost glazed yet perfectly focused on Louis.

They’d shared plenty of kisses before but never as heated as this. And their other kisses had been just that, just a kiss, nothing more. For the first time, Louis realised that this was actually leading somewhere else. He realised that they could actually allow it to lead to more. And then he remembered that there was something that he hadn’t shared with Harry yet.

“I got tested,” he announced, just as Harry was about to close the gap between them once more.    

That stopped Harry in his movements and he looked at Louis with a clear question in his eyes. “You did?”

Louis nodded. “I haven’t been out on the streets for weeks, I haven’t needed to.” He smoothed his hand across Harry’s chest slowly. “I got the money back – thanks to you.”

Harry smiled softly and ducked his head a little, almost like he was embarrassed.

Louis lifted his hand to run his fingers through Harry’s hair and guided his face back up so they were looking at one another again. “I don’t have enough words to tell you how grateful I am for what you’ve done. At first I was angry about it but now I realise how stupid that was. You’ve given me back my life, Haz.”

A wide smile split Harry’s face and he kissed Louis once before he pulled back again and looked at him expectantly. “So, you got tested?” he asked.

With a single nod, Louis replied, “Yes, I did. I wanted to be able to move past that part of my life and never look back. I got my results and I’m all clear.”

The beaming smile on Louis’ face as he made his announcement was matched by Harry’s own bright grin. “This is turning into the best day ever,” Harry laughed, before he leant down slightly and pressed his lips against Louis’ again.

Their kissing soon turned needier and deeper and they were both desperate for more touching, more movement, more _anything_ , so Louis shifted, pushing Harry’s legs wider apart so he could stand between them and they could rock against one another causing just the right amount of friction to make Harry moan and tear his lips away from Louis’. Immediately, he moved down to breathe deeply against Louis’ neck and then he attached his lips to the soft skin, sucking and biting gently.

“ _Fuck_ ,” Louis managed to gasp as he pushed his hips forward again; the combination of Harry’s mouth working on his neck and the feeling of his dick straining against his jeans all becoming quite overwhelming.

Harry looked up at him with dark eyes and a smile tugging at the corners of his mouth. “Bedroom?” he asked, in a voice that was even lower than usual.

Louis didn’t even have time to respond before Harry was kissing along his jaw line again, tilting his head ever so slightly to the side to gain better access. He slipped his hand between them and palmed the bulge at the front of Louis’ jeans. “Yes,” Louis eventually groaned out. “Yes, bedroom.”

Harry didn’t need telling twice. He grabbed Louis’ hand and pulled him towards his bedroom. They stumbled their way there, stopping every few feet so they could kiss again, until they eventually found themselves standing beside Harry’s bed.

Harry stepped around Louis and sat on the bed before he reached up and took Louis’ hand. He gently pulled him down to join him and they both lay down side by side.

While their kissing earlier had been desperate, now they were content to take their time licking into each other’s mouths and enjoying the way the heat between them was rising.

Their fingers slipped underneath each other’s clothing and it didn’t take long before they were both down to their boxers. As Harry kissed his way across Louis’ chest, his tongue flicked against his nipple and Louis moaned, shuddering slightly, clenching his hands in Harry’s hair.

Harry’s hand smoothed down Louis’ spine until it reached the curve of his bum and he squeezed firmly causing Louis’ hips to buck forward.

“I love you,” Harry spoke quietly against Louis’ chest. “I want to make you feel good.”

“I love you too,” Louis breathed out as he looked down at Harry. Their eyes met. “I love you so much.”

Harry continued kissing his way down Louis’ chest and stomach. He reached the top of his boxers and then pressed an open mouthed kiss to Louis’ hard cock that was pushing against the cotton. Louis moaned deeply, pushing his head back against the pillows and closing his eyes. With a slight smirk, Harry hooked his fingers into the waistband and pulled the clothing down Louis’ legs. Once he had thrown the boxers to the floor, he settled himself between Louis’ thighs and looked up at him. Louis had managed to open his eyes and was watching him in anticipation, his chest rising and falling quickly.

Harry leant forward and flicked his tongue against the head of Louis’ cock. He peered up at Louis through his eyelashes to see him swallowing thickly. As their eyes met again, Harry wrapped his lips around the head of Louis’ dick and sucked. Louis’ hands reached out, one twisting into Harry’s hair, the other fisting into the sheets. Harry began moving his head up and down, gradually taking more and more of Louis into his mouth.

“Oh… _fuck_ … _Harry_ ,” Louis moaned, as he tried not to buck up into Harry’s mouth. Harry had one hand pressing against his hip and the other wrapped around the base of Louis’ cock as he bobbed up and down, hollowing his cheeks as he took as much of Louis as he could.

Louis was almost fascinated by the sight of Harry’s lips stretched around him and the feeling of his warm mouth working up and down his dick. He could hardly bear to take his eyes off Harry but eventually the sensation became too much and he had to press his head back into the pillow in utter pleasure.

“Haz…Harry…I’m gonna come,” Louis gasped. His thighs were shaking from the sensation.

Harry pulled away just enough, rubbed his tongue against the underside of Louis’ cock once more and then Louis was shuddering all over as he came, his right hand squeezing the sheet tightly, while his left tugged at Harry’s hair with just a pleasantly painful amount of force.

When Louis had got his breath back and the feeling of weightlessness had faded a little, he pulled Harry in for a searing kiss.

“You look so amazingly hot when you’re having an orgasm,” Harry told him with a laugh and a peck to the lips.

“Well, that’s not fair,” Louis told him with a faux pout, “I haven’t got to see your orgasm face yet. Time to rectify the situation.”

He pushed Harry onto his back and arranged himself so he was lying half on top of him. One leg was flung over Harry’s so his thigh was teasingly close to Harry’s still hard cock. He palmed it once through the thin layer of Harry’s boxers and watched as Harry’s eyelids fluttered at the sensation.

He leaned over Harry and kissed him deeply as he trailed his fingers across his exposed flesh. Eventually, his hand moved to his boxers again and he dipped his fingers just below the waistband before tracing the edge of them slowly. Harry’s hips twitched upwards ever so slightly, desperate for some friction on his dick, but it was obvious that he was trying to show restraint even with Louis teasing him.  

Eventually, Louis shifted so he could use both hands to pull Harry’s underwear down. Harry gladly lifted his hips to allow the material to be removed and then Louis wrapped his hand around Harry’s cock firmly at the base and stroked upwards.

Harry moaned immediately at the sensation but it quickly became a whine as Louis slid his thumb over the slit at the head of Harry’s cock. Using the pre-come that had gathered at the tip to make the slide of his hand better, Louis smoothed his fist back down to the base. He twisted his wrist slightly on the upstroke and Harry pushed his hips up into the feeling as his hand moved down once more.

There was something utterly entrancing about watching Harry like this and Louis couldn’t tear his eyes away. He could feel his own arousal building again just from watching Harry pressing his head into the pillow and hearing him groan in pleasure.

Unexpectedly, he felt Harry’s slightly shaky fingers wrap around his wrist and cease his actions.

“Lou,” he breathed. “I want you. I want you to fuck me.”

Louis’ breath hitched in his throat. “Are you sure?” he asked quietly.

Harry nodded immediately. “I love you. I want to feel you inside me.”

“Oh shit,” Louis breathed.

Instantly, Harry’s eyes widened and he propped himself up on his elbows. “What’s wrong?” he asked in concern, worried that he was asking too much of Louis.

“Nothing’s wrong,” Louis shook his head quickly. “I just…how did I get so lucky all of a sudden? Why do I get to be with you? You’re so…amazingly wonderful.”

Harry shook his head slightly and pulled Louis in for a long, deep kiss. “ _I’m_ the lucky one,” he said forcefully. “But I don’t want you to do anything you don’t want to. I can wait.”

“No,” Louis replied immediately, almost comically quickly. “God Harry, I really want to, believe me. There’s nothing I’d like more right now. I just feel a bit like I’m in a dream – a really, really perfect dream – and I’m going to wake up at any moment.”

“It’s not a dream,” Harry replied simply. “It’s perfect, but it’s not a dream.”

Louis pressed his lips against Harry’s again. “I love you,” he whispered against his cheek. “Have you got stuff?”

Harry leant over and fumbled around in his bedside cabinet for a few moments before he fell back against his pillow with a pack of condoms and a bottle of lube in his hand. He placed them on the bed before he reached up to pull Louis back in for another kiss.

Then Louis sat up a little and reached for the bottle, before snapping the lid off and squeezing some lube onto his fingers.

They moved to lie side by side and as their lips met again, Louis trailed his hand down to stroke against Harry’s bum with his slicked fingers. Harry’s lips parted ever so slightly as Louis pushed his finger against his hole, just nudging inside slowly. Louis worked his finger in and out gradually letting Harry adjust to the feeling, before pushing in eventually with two fingers. Harry pushed back against his fingers as he moved them in and out, so Louis added a third finger before spreading them and twisting them slightly.

“Lou…” Harry groaned against his shoulder as he moved his fingers in a particular way. “ _God_.”

Louis smiled to himself as he watched Harry grinding back against his fingers and beginning to writhe. He twisted his fingers in the same way once more and Harry moaned long and low again.

“Lou…Lou, I’m ready. I want you, I need you now,” Harry gasped.

Louis leant forward and kissed him deeply again before he pulled his fingers out. He reached for a condom from the packet, tore it open and Harry helped him to roll it onto his erection. As he squeezed more lube out onto his hand and stroked it over the condom, Harry looked up at him.

“How do you want me?” he asked.

Incredibly, ridiculously cheesy words like, ‘Any way I can,’ popped into Louis’ head and he thought that Harry would probably actually appreciate how soppy that sounded but, instead of saying that, he settled for, “On your back, so I can see you.”

Harry smiled and nodded in agreement, spreading his legs to allow Louis to move closer. Louis leaned over him, one hand around the base of his cock as he guided it towards Harry’s waiting hole. Lifting his legs to wrap around Louis’ hips, Harry reached up to thread his fingers into the hair at the nape of Louis’ neck.

Smoothing his hand down Harry’s thigh and towards his bum, Louis gave the cheek a final squeeze before beginning to push inside. Both of them drew in deep, slow breaths as Louis continued to press forwards; Harry adjusting to the stretch and the sensation of being so thoroughly filled, Louis marvelling at the heat and tightness of Harry’s body below him and not wanting it to be over before it had properly begun.

Once Louis had pushed in completely, he stilled, wanting Harry to let him know that it was alright to continue. He leant down slightly and kissed him deeply, tongue licking into his mouth again.

“You can move Lou, I’m ready,” Harry murmured against his lips as he pulled back to look him in the eyes. He kept one hand behind Louis’ neck to hold him close while the other one reached down and stroked across the back of Louis’ thigh, encouraging him to move.

Louis began to move, slowly at first, but with Harry’s low groans spurring him on, he soon picked up a steady rhythm. He nosed into the curls falling down the side of Harry’s head and pressed his lips to the soft, sweat-covered flesh of his neck. Slightly changing the angle of his movements caused a sudden gasp to fall from Harry’s lips and when Louis looked up at him, he saw his lips were parted and his eyes were squeezed shut. His chest was rising and falling rapidly as Louis continued to thrust into him at the same angle. Louis reached between them and wrapped his fist around Harry’s cock, stroking it firmly, trying to match the movements of his hips as much as possible, and loving the sight of Harry turning his face into the pillow, his mouth fallen open in bliss.

Both of them were moaning and panting into the space between them.

“Oh _God_ , Lou…I’m close, I’m close,” Harry gasped out.

His hand suddenly tightened around the back of Louis’ thigh and he began shuddering all over. The warmth of his come covered Louis’ hand and their stomachs and chests, and Louis didn’t think he’d ever seen anything hotter than Harry’s face in that moment. Slowing his actions for a moment just so he could watch Harry, Louis wondered (not for the first time) how he was so lucky.

When Harry had come down from his high and regained some control of his breathing, he reached up with a slightly shaky hand and ran his fingers through Louis’ sweaty hair.

“Come on, Lou,” he murmured. “I want you to come again.”

Louis kissed him firmly and picked up his momentum once more. He knew Harry would be sensitive now but he also knew that it wasn’t going to take himself long to reach his orgasm after what he had just witnessed.

Harry continued to run his fingers through Louis’ hair as he slammed into him. He tightened his legs around Louis to draw him even closer.  

“I love you so much,” he whispered, his voice still at a lower pitch than usual.

That was all Louis needed. With a long, deep groan, he felt the coiling sensation inside him explode, as he squeezed his eyes shut, saw white behind his eyelids, and came.

Breathing heavily, he flopped down onto Harry and immediately felt strong arms wrap around his sweaty back as he continued to shudder through the after-shocks.

After he had calmed his racing heart, he pushed himself up on his elbows so he could look down into Harry’s eyes.

“That was…” he trailed off, not really having the words to explain how he felt.

Harry leant up and captured his lips in a soft kiss.

“Perfect,” Harry said as he laid his head back onto the pillow and smiled up at him.

Louis hummed in agreement. That was probably the best word to sum it up. He pushed himself up onto his knees, quickly removed the condom, hopped off the bed and disposed of it in the waste paper basket underneath Harry’s desk. Then he turned back to the bed. Climbing back onto the mattress, he straddled Harry’s thighs. He leant down to kiss Harry chastely but resisted when Harry tried to pull him closer.

Harry pouted up at him.

“We’re all sticky,” Louis announced from his position above Harry. “I definitely need a shower.”

“I really don’t want to move though,” Harry whined. “We could just stay here and cuddle.”

Louis rolled his eyes playfully. “Nah,” he said with a shake of his head and a cheeky smile. “I’m going for a shower. I suppose you could join me, or you can stay here all by yourself and be lazy if you’d rather.” With that he pecked Harry on the lips, then pushed himself up and climbed off the bed. If he wiggled his bum a little more than usual as he crossed the bedroom, no-one needed to know.  

The look on Harry’s face clearly showed that there was no debate necessary. He pushed himself up eagerly and followed Louis out of the bedroom with a smile on his face.

***

By the time they emerged from the shower, it was nearly four o’clock. It seemed to take a long time to actually achieve anything, seeing as they kept stopping to steal a kiss or stroke a hand across bare skin.

Louis scrubbed the towel through his hair one final time and then stopped to look at Harry who was grinning at him from his position seated on the edge of the bed.

“What are you grinning at?” he asked with narrowed eyes but a playful twist to his mouth.

“Just thinking how cute you look with your hair sticking out in all different directions,” Harry replied.

Dropping his towel over the back of Harry’s chair, Louis strode towards him, pushed him back onto the bed and climbed up to sit on his thighs. Harry’s grin had fallen away and his mouth was hanging open a little in surprise but the fact that he was turned on by Louis’ actions was obvious. That was a revelation that Louis was keen to investigate further at a later date.

He leant forward and practically growled against Harry’s ear, warm breath tickling the sensitive flesh.

“I thought I told you not to call me cute.”

Then he started sucking at the soft skin behind Harry’s ear.

An involuntary shudder passed through Harry’s entire body and Louis smirked to himself.

“Alright,” Harry gasped. “Not cute.” He groaned a little. “How about ‘hot’? Incredibly fucking hot.”

Louis pushed himself up to look down at him. He was smiling deviously. “Much better,” he nodded.

“Love you,” Harry told him as he reached up a hand to smooth Louis’ damp hair down.

A wide smile split Louis’ face. This was real. He was actually able to do this. He was here with Harry, actually able to kiss him and touch him and tell him he loved him.

“Love you too,” he replied quietly before he kissed Harry again.

When he sat up again he sighed deeply. “I’ve got to go,” he said a little sadly. “The girls will be home from school and I’ve got to get back to make sure they haven’t started a war over the TV.”

Harry allowed him to stand up and finish getting dressed and then they made their way through to the living room.

As Louis pulled on his jacket, Harry stopped him with a hand cupped to his cheek and a gentle kiss to his lips. He looked deep into Louis’ eyes before he spoke slowly.

“Lou, I know that, well before, you were worried about how to explain ‘us’ to the girls. But if it helps at all, I’d very much like to call you my boyfriend.”

Louis’ eyes widened and he smiled brightly. He surged forwards to wrap his arms around Harry’s neck and kissed him over and over.

“Does that mean you agree to my suggestion?” Harry laughed between kisses.

“Of course!” Louis told him happily. “I’d very much like to call you my boyfriend too.”

They both laughed again; it was like the weight of the world had been lifted from them over the course of the last few hours.

“Would you like to come back with me?” Louis asked hopefully. “I know four girls who would be over the moon to see you. And I _suppose_ I could put up with you hanging around.”

Harry grinned and grabbed Louis’ hand. “I’d love to,” he said brightly. “There’s nowhere else I’d rather be.” He pressed a kiss to the top of Louis’ head and reached for his car keys.

Once they’d both got their shoes and jackets on, they headed out of the flat and down to Harry’s car, walking hand in hand and pressed closely together, both of them grinning like fools.

As they walked, Louis realised that for the first time in a long while, he felt truly happy. He felt like he had a future ahead of him. The weariness of the last few years of grief, worry and bleakness wasn’t dragging him down anymore. He looked up at Harry and wondered why he’d spent so long trying to hold him at arm’s length. In that moment, he truly realised that loving someone and being loved by them wasn’t so scary after all.    

  


End file.
